On a whim, and out of boredom, I decided to cruise through my neighborhood H&M while running errands late last week. In addition to a thumping techno soundtrack and a bevy of summer sale items, I was treated to a display of “just arrived” styles that were surrounded by a flurry of women who were eager to get their hands (and wallets) on affordable, trendy clothing before the last size 6 was snatched up.
I walked over cautiously, careful to steer clear of 19-year olds equipped with quick feet and their parents' Visa cards, and started to browse the racks. I'm one of those lucky few who can find cashmere diamonds in a sea of polyester rough, and given the extensive amount of activity amongst the collections, I knew I was probably in for something good. Except, this time, I wasn't.
Once the crowd dissipated, my eyes met the glazed stare of a mannequin dressed in denim cut-off shorts, an oversized, sequined tank top and a blazer made for an 8-year old boy. On her feet were a pair of gladiator heels bejeweled with rhinestones of every color. And as I looked around, I noticed that the racks I was surrounded by were also full of these same items: torn denim shorts that left little to the imagination and were cut as narrow as one of my thighs - singular; tank tops that looked more akin to the shapeless house dresses my Polish grandmother would wear on Sunday mornings in the summer than a layering piece for smartly dressed ladies; and miniature sport coats that belonged at a boarding school, not on women with breasts, waists and hips. (Don't get me started on the sandals.) This outfit, a combination of late 80s pop culture with a bit of bohemia and a lot of rock-n-roll, looks good on .005% of the female population. And that person is named Kate Moss.
Ironically, as my heart and hopes concurrently sank with the knowledge that I wouldn't be leaving the store with a fashion steal in tow, the Rolling Stones song, “You Can't Always Get What You Want” came over the Muzak system. Indeed, I thought, as I turned towards the exit sign. Indeed.
