Dethrone the Crone: Let Your Amazon Queen Reign in 2010

This year, embrace your possibilities.

I was one of those kids who couldn’t wait to grow up so I could do anything I wanted: play jacks forever, be president and eat cookies for breakfast! Underneath that is the desire for power and self-determination –and there is nothing wrong with that! But it’s easier said (especially as a rebellious 8 year old) than done (at whatever age you currently are.) Many people look up in midlife and realize they followed their parents’ footsteps without exploring if the shoe fits.

My friend and colleague, Barbara Biziou, seems to be living the adult version of that childhood fantasy of “doing what you want when you want.” Barbara is obviously not president and at least attempts to not eat cookies for breakfast, but she has built a life that certainly was not reflected in any of my elementary school books. For example, Barbara leads people on magical journeys to Belize for the Spring Solstice, hosts vision workshops, and in her capacity as an interfaith minister and ritual expert marries people!

When I caught up with Barbara she said, “Before our current era, there were three stages of life for women. You went from maiden to mother to crone.” The definition of crone is an “ugly, withered hag, a witchlike old woman” (let me be clear they don’t mean bewitching.) Crone hails from the Old Northern French word carrion, which yes, means dead and decaying flesh. … now that stinks. Far out the groovy ‘60’s destabilized this limited view of the female lifespan! 

 Barbara focuses much of her ceremonial work on the phase that comes after maiden: the Amazon Queen stage. As many More.com writers have poignantly shared, this powerful stage is often triggered by crisis (heartbreak, loss, being older than the president) but the turmoil can lead women to wake up, buy some Jimmy Choos, and seek genuine ways of living and loving.

 The power of the Amazon Queen energy incorporates making mistakes. Barbara says, “We’re real, not perfect.” In her work with rituals she bridges many cultures. She revels in her multi-generational connections. “It keeps me alive!” Barbara says people can become fossilized when they separate themselves from younger generations. As an early feminist, her role models for success were men. Now, she actively mentors younger women. She describes the strong Amazon Queen state as secure enough to learn – which could include getting a tutorial from someone decades younger! (Hmmm, is that not a working definition of a cougar?)

Barbara used to be computer phobic, which you would never guess visiting her site today. Her 20-something interns showed her “it’s easy” to Facebook and Twitter. Barbara loves e-communication and incorporates this modern convenience into her ancient rituals. She endorses a practical spirituality so you can use aspects of ceremony anywhere for easy integration into daily life (whether you are on the subway or with your grandchildren.)  Watch the youtube of a ceremony she created for a group of beauty bloggers.