Then, I spotted him. My Joey. He was off to the far side of a corner shelf, his business end flopped over a bit. I sidled over to him. He was a bit scruffy looking, but he was there!
And then…we touched.
I thought maybe I should buy something else to detract attention away from my purchase, like gum. Just came in for the Wrigleys and stumbled on Joey for a friend. But there was no gum in sight. Oh WELL.
I carried him to the counter where a bored looking young woman took him out of my clammy hands and turned him in hers as she searched for the price. I realized as she was doing this that the markdown tags had fallen off and the $44.85 tag remained. She started to ring up that price.
“Excuse me,” I said. “This was marked down…at least twice.”
She gave me the once over and called to someone behind her.
“Candace! I need a price check!”
Nobody came. People turned to ogle the ogre with the freaky purchase. I shrunk down a size. I think my hair was sweating.
“It’s so cold out for this time of year, huh?”
She snapped her gum and stared at me for a beat. “Yeah, well, it’s winter.”
I barked a laugh. “You’re right about that!”
“Candace!!” she yelled out of the side of her mouth.
A cross-eyed twenty-something with dyed-fuscia pigtails and black retro-nerd glasses popped out from a back room. She glanced at Joey and beamed at me.
“Great choith!” she said, lisping slightly.
“Thanks, I – “
“No really, he’s a best theller. Bed Buddy Line. Quality thtuff.” She wrapped him carefully in dark purple tissue paper and tucked him in a brown paper bag.
