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Sexy at Any Age, Any Size

"Do I look fat in this?" has become the question with the most feared answer. If you believed what you saw, read, or heard on TV, radio, movies, and magazines, you'd think that was the most frequently asked question by women everywhere. It's become the battle cry of American women.

Or perhaps you're more familiar with a less-direct, flip-flopped approach. Instead of you directly asking such a question, somebody might say, "You look thin in that," which is designed to positively reinforce whatever you were doing to look that way. If you only heard it about one outfit, that may be the only thing you'd feel secure enough to wear.

Women often think that once they're a "fill-in-the-bank" size, they're no longer sexy. I've discovered you can look sexy at any size–it's all in your attitude as portrayed by your dress and demeanor.

Many women are embracing the concept that "40 is fabulous" but still feel that "50 is the year you become invisible." But that doesn't have to be true. You can be just as invisible at 30 as you can at any age. It's all in your attitude, portrayed in your walk, your demeanor, your style, and your confidence level. And if you're not feeling totally confident then see what happens when you start to fake the confidence. It's funny how when we start accepting ourselves as we are, elevating our self-esteem, other positive results occur.

Oprah Winfrey credits her trainer with turning her battle with her weight around when he asked her why she didn't love herself. Once she took note of that and began loving herself, that was the breakthrough she needed. But no matter what your current size or shape, you'll be perceived as more attractive if you act as if you are attractive.

I recently observed a very sexy woman in the mall, possibly the sexiest woman in the mall that day. What made her sexy? She knew she was sexy. She wore it like she owned it. Some might think she was way too heavy to be sexy but the well-fitted little black dress she wore, the way she wore it, her hair, makeup and the cutest little white stilettos she wore, were risky and stunning at the same time. And you should have seen the look of admiration in the men's eyes and pure envy in the women's.

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07.13.2009
Heather Hiett
Hi Kathy! Great story, great concept. Yes, it's all about the beauty coming from the inside out. There's a great quote by Diana Vreeland you may have heard, ''you don't have to be born beautiful to be wildly attractive.'' So true. (btw, she lived in an almost entirely red apartment in NYC!). It's fascinating to watch women, as you describe in your story, who may not be the media prototype for "beautiful" or "sexy", but ARE and are having fun workin' it. Congratulations on the novels! -Heather ps- my dad just gave me the best book I've ever read on writing, "If You Want to Write," by Brenda Ueland
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