4. Don’t confront the other woman. It usually doesn’t help and often backfires. If she is still interested in your man, she will play the victim and he will take her side. Even if she’s willing to back away, telling her off will probably make him feel sorry for her—when he should be feeling sorry for you. If he wants to reconcile with you and you make headway, you’ll discover that your desire to speak to her diminishes over time.
5. Don’t degrade or lower yourself. Some people who’ve been cheated on act in ways they’d never act otherwise. They get drunk, throw things, have a revenge affair, flirt, or besmirch his good name around town. Your esteem has probably taken a big hit already. Don’t add to it by acting in ways you’ll regret later.
Dr. Paul Coleman is the author of “You, Him, and the Other Woman: Break the Love Triangle and Reclaim Your Marriage, Your Love, and Your Life.”
