I’m not ready to admit I’m so old I need glasses to read restaurant menus.
I had always relished in the fact that I had perfect eyesight. My older sister wore glasses and was blind without them. I used to laugh at her thinking that I could see far and near and would never have that problem. However, the day I turned 40, all that changed. For some reason, my eye muscles simply weakened on that birthday. I couldn’t read the fine print on my birthday cards and I noticed I had to hold things farther and farther away. I remembered my father having that problem. And now it was happening to me. The name of the disorder is presbyopia, a weakening of the eye muscles as we age.Look everywhere and you’ll find reading glasses for sale on every check-out counter. You’ll find them in official looking styles or rhinestone funky styles. There are styles for every personality and whim. I hate wearing them but I keep one pair in every room of my house and one in my purse. When I’m in public I just ask the waiter or anyone with me to read the items on the bill or menu for me. I just don’t like wearing reading glasses in public. It’s like wearing a big sign that says “Hey, I’m getting old”! Or “Hey, I’m your mother’s age”! I’m just not ready for that. Maybe it’s because I’m single without children and I’m afraid I’ll scare suitors away...I don’t know. I’m just not ready to give in to old age just yet.
It’s not just the reading glasses--why do business cards come printed in the smallest print imaginable? I also don’t own a cell phone because I can’t read the numbers or the text messages. Brochures, pamphlets doctors order, directions from a doctor about before and after care are all written in 12 point. Do people know how many baby boomers there are out there? WE CAN’T READ PRINT SMALLER THAN 16 or 18 point without glasses. And I don’t want to wear one of those eyeglass holders that hang around your neck. I remember Mrs. Perez my sixth grade teacher wearing one. It looked good on her but it’s not for me. I’ll never wear one of those.
So what do we do? Well, I think business cards should be printed on sides, one side for young people, and the other for older folks. Thank God there’s a new cell phone called the Jitterbug with large numbers and new land phones with large numbers. Unfortunately, living on Guam, I can’t get access to the Jitterbug phone. As for restaurants, I say print two menus also. Let us older folk not have to pull out our reading glasses.
By the way, don’t think you can get laser surgery to repair presbyopia. Laser surgery can’t fix it. I’ve checked. You may opt to wear bifocal glasses or contact lenses but I choose not to. I’m not near sighted so I don’t need bifocals and I can’t wear contacts. I tried the colored pair as a young adult and spent more time trying to fish them out of my eye. They literally got lost in my eye…. So I gave up. I just prefer not to wear glasses period.