1. Your breasts and your belly button are now BFFs.
2. Your pants fit better backwards because your booty is MIA.
3. ... or you still have junk in your trunk but you kick it when you walk.
4. Little kids ask why you scribbled on your legs with blue magic marker.
5. Your menopot looks more like a Buddah than a belly dancer.
6. Your upper arm gave you a black eye when you waved goodbye.
7. Your husband has a better hairline.
8. Your daily medications outnumber your vitamin supplements.
9. A Shar Pei thinks you are his mother.
10. You look in a mirror and a man is looking back at you.
