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What Cougars Really Want (It's More Than You Think)

Linda Franklin, founder of therealcougarwoman.com, on the top 5 things cougar women want from their men.

If you are a Real Cougar, a woman who is smart, confident and independent, you have taken risks, traveled down many different roads and learned a lot of valuable lessons along the way.

I don’t have to tell you falling in love is easy but keeping that love sizzling is a lot more difficult. We cougars like to do things our way and the truth is it’s hard for some men to keep up with us. Sure, we are over 40 and some of us over 50, but we keep our bodies and minds in tip-top shape. And, contrary to public opinion, we are not ready to pack up our sexuality either. In fact as we get older sex  becomes even more fun. We are much more confident, we tell our man what makes us smile, and are much more adventurous than we’ve ever been.

That’s why it’s not surprising that so many women are trading in their 60-year-old man for two energetic 30-year-olds.

So what do cougars really want from the man in their life? In our twenties we were looking for a tall, dark and handsome stranger to sweep us off our feet. We wanted Prince Charming. Today things are a lot different. We’ve learned by trial and error what works and what doesn’t in making a relationship thrive. I polled the thousands of women in The Real Cougar Woman Club, my online community, and here’s what they told me they want most:

A man who accepts you for the women you are, not some fantasy he’s concocted.

A man who is secure with who he is and doesn’t need you to complete him.

A man who is a good decision maker and keeps a cool head when yours isn’t.

A  man who is relaxed and easygoing, especially if you have a demanding power job.

A  man who is loving and affectionate, and who appreciates the adventurous sex goddess  you really are.

A  man who won’t be crushed if you make more money than he  does.

If you are lucky enough to find a guy with all those qualities, you are going to be one happy cougar. I would love to hear what makes your relationships work. Please share by leaving a comment below.

Linda Franklin is the author of Don't Ever Call Me Ma'am: The Real Cougar Woman Handbook and the founder of TheRealCougarWoman.com.

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12.11.2009
Chiva
One thing that makes my relationship work is that I have more life experience then he has. Since I have survived more situations I am able to understand and put myself into his shoes. His 3 children are younger then mine, so when we started dating my children were fine with it. However, his were not. He is on his 2nd divorce & his daughter does not want to even see me. So we talked about his marriages and I was able to see his "pattern" & explained to him what is children were seeing & going through. I tend to make him see & feel what they are going through. He was use to being the one with the right answers ALL the time & now he is getting use to the fact that he doesn't know ALL the answers. I am teaching him to communicate with me as well as his children. Communication is still the key to any relationship.
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