You’re Getting Divorced…Now Throw a Party!

Divorce is the beginning of your new life—and just like any important milestone it should be treated as one

by Lois Tarter • Divorce Blogger and Author of “The Divorce Ritual”
Photograph: Nick Bell

Divorce is a moment in someone’s life that should be celebrated. That’s right, celebrated!  While that might sound a bit strange to you at first, it’s actually pretty normal (and probably a lot more normal than your ex). You obviously got married and chances are it was a big event. There was lots of planning, organizing, and compromising to make the big day an important one for you and your husband to mark the new stage of your lives. Well, divorce is the beginning of your new life—and just like any important milestone it should be treated as one. 

Divorce parties are becoming more and more popular. There’s nothing like having all of your friends cheering you on—with a cosmo in hand! What makes my divorce parties unique are the “divorce rituals” that the divorcee performs at the event. These are fun, healing and empowering activities. Now, this event is not an ex-bashing affair. Sure, his name might come up and there may a few party activities that poke a little fun (like the “Pin the Tail on the Ex” game), but this event is about you and moving on.

In my new book The Divorce Ritual: Get Up, Get Out and Get On With Your Life, I share ideas on how to throw your very own divorce party. Here,  some of my “divorce rituals” to make your divorce party a memorable one:

Divorce Costume Party: Don't wait for Halloween to throw a costume party. Dressing up is fun any time of year and a divorce party is a great excuse to try something totally different. Throw a divorce costume party where all of the guests have to dress up as a famous divorced person.  Count on a lot of Elizabeth Taylor and Jennifer Lopez look-alikes. 

Put the Garter Back On: This game is one of my favorites. Every bride remembers when her husband took the garter off at the wedding. This time, have one of your best friends put a garter back on you. You will feel an immediate sense of having come full circle.

Fly Fly Away: In this ritual, you will need balloons and some small pieces of paper.  On each piece of paper, write what you disliked about your old life and what you want from your new one. Put the pieces of paper into the balloons, blow them up and let them go! This is a great way to release stress.

The Manata:  Get a piñata and put one of your ex’s ties around it. Make sure there’s something fun inside for when it breaks open. (A bunch of condoms might make sense. Heck, the divorcee is single again and needs to practice safe sex.)

Cheers to No More Tears: It’s very important to have a speech at this event. After all, you made it through the woods and now it can only go up from here. Get the champagne ready and click your glasses with all of your friends and family. Tell them how much you care about them and that their support meant everything. Have your best friend give a bridesmaid-like speech and give a cheers to no more tears.

For more party ideas and divorce rituals, pick up a copy of Lois Tater’s new book “The Divorce Ritual.”

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