My divorced friend often laments it’s hard to meet men. I’ve suggested she spend a few hours browsing Home Depot on a Saturday but so far she hasn’t taken my advice. I think in order to find a man you have to go where the men are. It makes perfect sense, and it’s something I think the guys have figured out. At least, due to some experiences I’ve had while shopping, it seems that way.
My daughter and I were browsing in a gift store, her in one aisle and me in another. I was looking at a mug with an astrological inscription on it, when suddenly a man’s voice said, “Pisces. Is that your sign?”
“Yes it is,” I replied.
He went on to tell me it was a good sign and that he too was a Pisces. He was very nice and interesting. The conversation went on for a few moments with him doing most of the talking. He shared pretty much his life story with me before I excused myself to find my daughter. When I found her and told her I thought I’d been hit on, she laughed and laughed. We browsed some more and a while later went to the check out.
The cashier looked at me and asked, “Are you a Pisces?”
Thinking things were getting more peculiar by the moment I said, “Yes, how did you know that?”
She handed me the Pisces mug. “A gentleman purchased this and asked me to give it to you.”
My daughter’s eyes got huge. “Just our luck mom,” she said. “Why couldn’t you have been shopping for a car?”
That was a nice experience and there have been a few. Once I met a man while shopping in a home décor store. He really knew what he was doing, that’s one place a man is sure to meet a woman. He’d recently divorced and was decorating his new apartment located conveniently nearby. He wondered if I could give him some decorating advice. He threw in the fact that he loved animals, was a great cook and had five sisters that loved him dearly. He alluded to lunch. Yes, he was very clever and smooth, but a little slow in noticing my wedding band, thus wasting valuable time on me.
There was one incident shopping though that wasn’t so pleasant and I’d just as soon forget.
I was packing groceries into the back of the van when someone said, “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice you shopping.”
I looked up, surprised to see a man I’d noticed earlier in the store. He was nice looking, wearing a suit and tie, one of those traveling salesmen types with the clipboard and briefcase, who have the manager and employees falling all over them.
“I was wondering if you’d like to go for a coffee?” he asked, extending his hand and adding, “I’m James.”
“Nice to meet you,” I said a little hesitantly. “But no, I’m sorry I can’t.”
“There’s a coffee shop just up the road,” he went on.
“No, I’m sorry I really can’t,” I repeated, loading the groceries a little quicker.
“Why not? You can trust me,” he continued. “We can drive there in separate cars.”
He explained he traveled to that store and others in the area once or twice a month and it would be nice to have a friend to go for coffee with.
He seemed to be getting irritated.
People have accused me of being naïve in the past, but this guy wasn’t fooling me. He didn’t want a friend to have coffee with once a month. Who was he trying to kid, and why did he choose me?
He tried complimenting me and continued to push, at which point I said, “ I can’t, and I don’t think my husband would approve.”
I started feeling a little nervous, finished loading the groceries and quickly got in the van, locking the door.
“It’s just coffee,” he said. “Gimme a break.”