Laurie: Another couple of teeth fell out of my rattail comb today. Remember rattail combs? In the era of teased hair, we used them to poof our hair to impossible heights. I’m still amazed that my hair fit into my senior picture. I have a very short neck, but the hair in all its glory was still intact. Anyway about ten years ago, I purchased what quickly became the perfect rattail comb and have been looking for a duplicate ever since. It turns out that this particular comb is the sublime finishing touch to my daily hairstyle. Sure, you can still get a rattail comb but now the rattails are ergonomically perfected, the teeth are longer, they have more weight, and they do not enhance my lovely locks.
elizabeth: You got me scared for a minute when you said that a couple of teeth fell out. I immediately went to the part of my brain that can visualize accidents, murders and mouths filled with holes … the things that most people would like to avoid viewing. I must say that it was quite the look. But then you wrote about your hair being teased to new heights and I wanted to shut my brain down. I always tell hairstylists to not approach my hair with the plan of making it any bigger than God had intended my hair to go. One had the nerve once to make me leave with bigger hair than my body weight could handle, and when I came back (yes, I gave her one more chance), she inquired how I liked it. I told her that my hair picked up CNN as I ran back to my car. “Ahh,” was all she said. No other words were needed. I don’t think I would put anything close to my face that has the name rattail attached to it. It’s a religious thing.
Laurie: Another missing item is lipstick in a tube by Avon. Wineberry. That is an absolutely made-for-Laurie color that goes with every outfit I have. Squirt a little on and you are good to go for the whole day. For years, I have been searching Avon catalogs, walking street fairs that sell outdated makeup, and visiting fancy-dancy department stores that swear they can duplicate the color. No, they can’t. So me and my almost-depleted last tube return home in vain. It is time to give up the search and accept defeat. But I have to say if anybody can find those Cherokee jeans that make my ass look smaller, I will take a dozen pairs in every color they make. In return, you will be guaranteed a lifetime supply of rattail combs and almost-wineberry lipstick.
elizabeth: Wow—my own rattail combs and wineberry lipstick in a tube for life. You make it so tempting that I just might force myself to go out and search for those Cherokee jeans that made your butt look smaller. But then you said something about it being time to admit defeat. Or maybe it’s the gods telling you to try something new. You remember white lipstick, George W. Bush, the Jerk (no, this time I mean the dance) … yes, the time was and is right to try something new. Berries in the snow lipstick anyone?