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The Beastie Boys’...

The Beastie Boys’ Parents on Fashion

Looking around at the fads for guys these days, it looks like really bad 70s hair meets skater clothes from the 80s. To top it off, the boys who opt for the skater look tend to wear girls skinny jeans to maximize tightness. I guess they don’t have any good skinny jean options for guys. There’s a business opportunity there folks!

At the opposite end of the spectrum, boys are still sportin’ the super low rider baggy jeans, belt under the bum, and the pants crotch at the knees. How hot is that? Ugh! To make matters worse, they wear t-shirts that are reminiscent of 80s t-shirt dresses. I don’t know where they find these shirts, but they’re long and skinny. The shirts tend to fall all the way at the knees (hence the 80s dress reference). I’m sorry guys, but when was the last time you found a girl wearing the equivalent of a potato sack (or rather 20 lbs of clothes that bunch, gather and cover every inch of her) and thought she was hot? If you can identify with this statement, then I’m assuming that you only thought her face was hot because the rest of her was missing. Which is exactly how we feel when we see guys running around in mounds of clothes. Blech! It’s not flattering or cute, it’s just lame.

Really, I think the Beastie Boys said it best when singing about the perils of living with parents (at least that’s my take on the song).

“Get outta this house if that’s the clothes you’re gonna wear! I’ll kick you outta my home if you don’t cut that hair!”

I can just imagine how many households go through that same routine on a daily and weekly basis based on what their boys are sportin’. I don’t want to come off as a fuddy duddy, but in my opinion, find something cute or flattering to wear, guys. Who/what are you trying to attract? I’m confused, but then again, I’m not in the target market. (Thank goodness!) However, I am rest assured that the Beastie Boys’ parents would agree with me on all this.

Related Story: Ten Things I Would Do as a Parent of a Teen

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