We Hear You! Letters from Our December 2013/January 2014 Issue

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by MORE • Editors
emma thompson cover image

Sometime back I got "an offer you cannot refuse" for a subscription to More Magazine.  (Its hype was that it was for the "older woman."  Past Ladies Home Journal and not quite to Modern Maturity.

I honestly expected to find something, anything that would appeal to my third age mentality.

This is some of what I found in the current issue:

Cover says:  Your best hair at 30, 40, 50.  (I infer that after fifty it's either hopeless or all your hair has fallen out.)

Younger Looking Hands--6 weeks to total transformation. Etc.  Little blurb on sexual positions.  Book reviews. Six page article on how to fail successfully:  Turning today's flop into tomorrow's triumph.  (Like that chocolate pie I made?  No way to turn that flop into a triumph--any day!!!!) I didn't read the article but I don't think it was about pie.  

Now I don't mind ads for Le Vian Chocolatier--but it's diamonds not chocolate.  I don't plan to go to Jared so I like to see the diamonds.  

Ad for a Lexus.  Nope.

Ad for Le vie est belle by Lancôme.  98.00 for 2.5 fl oz eau de parfum spray  

I admit that I am a frugalista, that status symbols and snobbery aren't on my agenda.  But this magazine made me wonder what I've done wrong in my life that I can't have a monthly income to allow me to pay:

$60.00 for a pair of patent smoking slippers  (can't think why anybody would want slippers that smoke?)

250.00 for Lancôme ultimate eye contour collection

36.00 for 6 little (as in hotel size) bars of soap

33.00 for twelve champagne flavored and golden hued macaroons

16.00 for 12 (yes 12) bite-size cake "truffles." (Read:  vanilla cake dipped in white chocolate and rolled in a rainbow-sprinkle crumble.

49.00 for four Literary quote cocktail plates.

42.00 for a tiny little candle (smells like Champagne)

14.00 for two recycled cashmere iron-on patches 

But this is the bit, which started my rampage:

Do-over for sun-damaged hands:

Help for slack skin and prominent veins:  One treatment (may take two).  Fat taken from stomach then injected into back of hands. 

Cost:  6500 to 8000.  (I saw some nice little gloves at Dollar Tree!)  

Spots:  No problem: Fraxel Laser treatment.  Two or three treatments averaging 1113 each. 

I think for the price of the hand treatment, the ultimate eye collection, three dozen cake truffles, enough iron-on patches to repair all my Goodwill sweaters with holes and 36 of the cocktail plates--or maybe 72  (Why have a "little" cocktail party? And then I'd need the DKNY silk dress for 695.) 

I could buy the Lexus!!

When I go to doctor offices I always look at People.  Pages and pages of gossip and I never know any one. Or I look at Vogue--where a clutch bag is advertised for only $3600. I feel ignorant and poor.  

Why not start a new magazine just for those of us who belong to La Tercera Edad.  The Third Age.  Good name for our magazine.  I can think of some very good articles. 

Like:

How To Know It's Time To Burn Your Bra (Not in revolt against the system but against agony)   

Does Preparation H Really Shrink Bags Under the Eyes?  

Comparing the Cost of the Remainder of Your Life on a Cruise with an Assisted Living Facility 

How to Teach Clerks, Wait Staff, Receptionists etc. That It is Not A Good Idea to Ignore You 

My Life as a WalMart Greeter

How to Take Advantage of Obama care to get a Pedicure if You Can't Bend Over or See Your Toes

Is There Really Life after 7:00 p.m.?

How to Find a Doctor or Dentist Who Does Not Look Fourteen Years Old but Who is Not Old Enough to Die Before You

Games and Puzzles To Make your Brain Sharp Enough to Remember Why You Have Been Standing in Front of the Refrigerator for Fifteen Minutes

And I bet we can get lots of ads for Depends, support hose, Metamusil, heating pads, old lady pocketbooks with compartments, denture cream, lift chairs, motorized scooters, hearing aids, wigs (since our hair fell out after 50),  

Share Your Thoughts!

Comments

03.19.2014

I too was upset with the article by Amanda Robb, "The Woman who won't back down". I am against violence in any form - the killing of Dr Tiller and the killing of innocent babies.
I am thankful for the extra regulations that have been placed on Abortion clinics and Planned Parenthood. " In one year South Wind performed 1000 abortions" says the article, Are they proud of this? I'm disgusted and sad. How about writing a piece on how abortions kill babies and the long-term psychological problems that occur with women who abort???


I was very angry when I read the article by Amanda Robb, "The Woman Who Won't Back Down." She is the person who took over Dr. Tiller's late term abortion facility. I found the article one sided and found it disturbing that she and Dr. Tiller were made to look like heroes. He should not have been murdered. His life was just as important as every one of the lives he took during his late term abortions. He did unspeakable evils to innocent unborn children, but he is a child of God and deserved life. No pro-life person would think otherwise. We would fight for his life too. Burkhart's comment, "Are we going to be a country that forces Midwestern women to be pregnant?", was ridiculous. It implied that women do not know what causes us to become pregnant! It sounded like we suddenly find ourselves pregnant maybe from something in the water! Pregnancy is not a germ or a disease that must be ripped out of a woman even up until birth as was done at that clinic. This is a living, growing child with a heartbeat. We get all up in arms about the use of fur and the killing of whales, and we should, but the babies need us too. Speak up! Women need help, not death for their unborn babies. One mother + one dead baby = two victims and one rich abortionist.

01.02.2014

Emma Thompson’s profile in your Dec 2013/Jan 2014 issue was both entertaining and interesting. As the article details, Emma Thompson “finds joy with extended family, a pantry full of comfort food, and a new burst of creativity” However, it would have been more informative to mention her latest “creative” endeavor: adding her name to the protest against the inclusion of the Israeli theater company Habima, at an Shakespeare festival held in May 2013. Ms. Thompson, along with more than thirty British stage and screen artists insisted that by “...inviting Habima, the Globe is associating itself with policies of exclusion practised by the Israeli state and endorsed by its national theatre company.” In this declaration the artists demanded that the invitation be withdrawn, “… so that the festival is not complicit with human rights violations and the illegal colonisation of occupied land.” It would be been more intellectually honest of More to include this facet of Emma Thompson, albeit a view perhaps less entertaining.
As the Bard of Avon might offer, "The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” Why pick on Israel? While I champion Ms. Thompson’s right and desire to protest human rights violations, her enthusiasm would appear a bit more genuine had she initiated a boycott of say, Yemen. In Yemen, a woman is not recognized as a full person before the court. Moreover, a single woman’s testimony isn’t taken seriously unless it’s backed by a man’s testimony, or concerns a place or situation where a man would not be. And women can’t testify at all in cases of adultery, libel, theft or sodomy.”(http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/10/27/7-ridiculou...) But given the misogynistic laws pervasive throughout the Muslim world, Yemen would certainly not be the only stop on Ms. Thompson’s train of righteous indignation, were it to allowed to proceed freely and factually. She and her cohorts have condemned Israel for its human rights violations in regard to Palestinians.
And, as the Bard would declare, “What light through yonder window breaks?” “Guess who graduated first in this year's medical school class at the Technion, Israel's version of M.I.T? “ Not surprising to those knowledgeable about Israel’s educational system, the answer is: “..an observant Islamic woman named Mais Ali-Saleh, who grew up in a small village outside of Nazareth, in Israel's Galilee.” (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/diana-bletter/guess-whos-valedictorian_b_3...) Though chic for many actors/musical artists to don the keffiyeh of outrage against Israel, the less fashionable pathway of historical truths would be the more admirable pursuit. In conclusion, the Bard is worth turning to: “in a false quarrel there is no true valor.”
Diane Biegel

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