We Hear You! Letters from Our September 2012 Issue

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by MORE • Editors
september 2012 image

I really enjoyed reading your letter in the September issue: A cut the crap guide to midlife friendship.  I am 52 years old and have 2 kids in high school.  Many of the friends that I had when my kids were younger are no longer my friends.  The friends that require constant attention, have the kids that do no wrong and appear to have the perfect life, are the ones to stay away from. Unfortunately  I had to learn that the hard way.  I hope at 52 I have become a little smarter.  Now I am trying to pass some of this information along to my  16 year old daughter (also information on boys to stay away from).  I don’t know if she will listen to me at this point in her life, but maybe later she will look back and think that her Mom was right about some things.
Thanks and love the magazine,
Nancy Talkington, Houston, TX

I just read your letter regarding midlife friendship. It was interesting, because the friends I have made in my midlife are my closest friends. We became friends through work connections: I am an orthopedic surgeon, Joan is a neurosurgeon, and Kathleen is a pediatric anesthesiologist in South Jersey. We are all in our late 40's and have been friends for 10 years. When we first met, we all hit it off because we have crazy hectic lives that other people can't really relate to: 2 of us own our own practices, 2 of us have 4 kids and an ex-husband each, one of us has 2 kids, one of us has a child with special needs and we have all had our most recent child in our mid-forties. We are all heads of the household, major breadwinners, and love to have fun. We have travelled together- our best trip was to Vegas where we were mistaken for "ladies of the evening"! We go through thick and thin together, and are there to emotionally support each other. We have a girl's weekend every summer where we go down the shore and have fun adventures, and discuss things like what drives us to keep going, and where our next trip will be (we are going to Greece/Turkey to celebrate our 50th birthdays!).

Thanks for getting me thinking about how important these friends are to me!
--Dr. Laura Ross

As I just finished reading your editorial, I realized just how true your statements are. I find myself now dragged away from my homeland of the good ole small town USA after many years with lifelong friends to be transported to live in Shanghai, China. Now that my children are no longer childlike, one is actually at NYU, and the other a senior here in high school, I find myself looking for friends outside the "kids zone."

I have learned that life is too short to surround yourself with friends who don't instantly give off the right fit! Like shoes or a great pair of jeans, we look for a good fit, comfort, and flexibility.
Here in China, I have surrounded myself with women of all ages and races who do just that. We find ourselves here in a culture that shifts constantly as people move in and out on average about every 2 years; therefore, we don't waste time on the "fad type jeans.”
When we do leave this place in the future, I hope to cling to a lesson learned about friendship, one that you so adequately stated in your column! I have learned that I can make new friends yet I will find the right fit! Thanks for affirming what I have now learned at age (soon to be 50).

Warmest Regards,
Lori Rice

Admittedly, I have not heard of More Magazine before and was surprised to find an issue in my mailbox.

While walking up the driveway, while the magazine was still in plastic, I had a feeling I was going to love the magazine for the sheer fact that Diane Lane has, of all things, crow’s feet, ON THE COVER. I immediately was intrigued at what this magazine had in store for me as I recently decided to not renew my subscriptions to Glamour and Cosmopolitan.

First Published June 28, 2012

Share Your Thoughts!


MeeCee Baker09.25.2012

I have been a supportive fan of More Magazine for years and appreciate the tag line: For Women of Style and Substance. When the October issue arrived, I immediately began leafing through the pages. While reading "A Field Guide to the Mature Male", I was floored by the disrepectful and low brow commentary. The magazine of style and substance has quickly morphed into that of the rude and crude. I am very disappointed in the editor's choice and believe an apology is in order. I have taught my teenage daughter to be civil and respectful. The magazine which treats her father in such a manner will no longer by placed on the coffee table for public consumption. Shame of the editors at More.

C Cocco09.24.2012

How and why would you include John Lennon in the Mature Man Hall of Fame for 1980? He physicall abused his first wife, Cynthia. He cheated on her, while still married, with Yoko Ono. And was estrangled with his son Julian. And you consider this a Mature Man? I certainly do not. He did honor or respect either of those individuals.

Mary-Anne 09.23.2012

I loved the outfit feature on page 4 of the September issue (love the skin you're in). I couldn't find any information about it in the article. Can you share who the designer is and where to buy? Gorgeous!

Patty Matteo09.17.2012

I absolutely love More magazine. I have given it to friends as gift for the past few years. I loved your article on Diane Lane. I have always liked her but reading this article has made me love her.
Patty Matteo
Colorado Springs, CO

Patricia B.09.14.2012

I'm liking the trend toward publishing articles with a little more substance. In particular, September Issue, "The Lawyer of Last Resort". Excellent article, excellent writing. It's nice to look at the pictures of all the lovely things to have and buy, but for real interest, the in depth articles are my favorite. Thank you!

Hi Sue Gilfoy, Sorry you're having trouble with the survey. We just checked and it looks like it's still opened. If you'd like to still take it, you could do so here: more.com/september-2012-survey. Thanks for the feedback! --MORE.com Editors


I am really tired of a general interest women's magazine, most of which I very much enjoy, using many articles as a forum to push politcal views and support particular candidates. I will let my subscription lapse the next time it comes up for renewal. I eagerly started reading your article "Why Testosterone is the New Estrogen" and ended up recycling the entire magazine after reading the first page of that article. Statements such as "And as we learned from Barack Obama, it takes only one person to make the picture look different" and then in the next paragraph statements about how wonderful the author believes Hillary Clinton and Nancy Pilosi to be are merely political, and have no place in this magazine. If I wanted to read a political magazine, I would buy one. I do not buy More for this and I do not want to see it, in particular in such a one-sided, biased manner. I am a successful professional woman, and I am a Republican. Please keep in mind that approximately 46% of Americans voted for the Republican candidate in the last election. I am offended by your obvious bias and your assumption, issue after issue, that everyone supports a certain party and the current president. This is not the case and statistics bear this out.

I enjoyed your brief article about the IPhone's Siri (p. 36, September 2012). But you missed the point when Siri sung the 1892 song, "Daisy, Daisy", which is actually called "Daisy Bell". According to Wikipedia (and anyone ever associated with or appreciative of the history of speech synthesis): In 1961 an IBM 704 became the first computer to sing, in a demonstration of Bell Labs' newly invented speech synthesis -- and the song was "Daisy Bell". In the 1968 film 2001: A Space Odyssey the intelligent HAL 9000 computer during its deactivation loses its mind and degenerates to singing "Daisy". The reason the computer reverted to singing this song, according to the film, was because it was one of the first things HAL learned when it was originally programmed. The author of the story, Arthur C. Clarke, had seen the 1961 demo. So Siri was reminding you of her heritage, which is kind of sweet.

chloe dreyfus09.02.2012

Just a note regarding teh Notebook item "Is Siri sexist?" In the movie 2001, when HAL the computer is being decommissioned, he regresses through his acquired intelligence. At one point he sings "Daisy," which was taught to him by his programmers in Uranna, IL, meant to be a dispaly of nuance and inflection. All 2001 fans - male and female -- appreciate the reference.

Sue Gilfoy08.30.2012

Just read the September issue and went on line to take the survey which is supposed to be open till 9/30. It is 8/30 and the website tells me the survey is closed. Why didn't you let it run till the date noted in Sept. issue? Anyway. . . a few comments. I have enjoyed your magazine for several years although I agree with a few of reader comments that it seems to be featuring younger women every month. What happened to celebrating the women who are in their 60's, 70's and even older? Surely there are some great "really" older women. Not every woman over 60 wants to be hidden away with a bag over her head. Many of us are proud of what we are doing and are living busy, vital lives - not sitting around waiting to get discarded. I enjoy many of your articles but find so many of your articles on fabulous fashions and beauty products to be way, way toooo expensive for the average woman of almost any age. In some issue your editors should challenge themselves to dress a woman head to toe for,say, less than $200 and look fabulous. Have you ever heard of resale? There are just as many classic styles just waiting to be discovered there as at Saks 5th Avenue or other high end stores.

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