Strength Through the Ages

by Christine Ferguson • Member { View Profile }

Write from the heart. This is great advice if you like to keep a journal or just give yourself a therapy session. Writing can open your vision and enhance your world in directions nothing else can do. Emotions are sometimes hard to express. Our world can feel difficult at times, this is when we need to open our journals or just write down on a piece of paper what we are feeling. Once you get started it is very addicting and helps so much with the feelings you can’t share. Even people close to you, that know your every thought, or so they think, haven’t walked in your shoes. Write down everything you want to talk to yourself about. OK, I’ll be first. Grandmother of seven, mother of four, living with relatives for over a year, newly divorced after 42 years and looking for employment. Desire to be independent, homeownership is not an option, renting option. Drives 1200 miles up and down the west coast staying at four different family members homes. At first it was an adventure but now getting difficult not to mention all the miles and wear on my car. The car is packed to the hilt, because I am open to employment anywhere and need to have different climate apparel. Sympathy is not an option, was it mentioned no health insurance, talk about living on the edge. The Northwest is great for climate and some family there,plus inexpensive to rent. Employment isn’t easy to obtain. Now we must remember that many women in life have many more obstacles and difficulties. Fortunately, my children are raised and I only have myself to worry about. People think there is nothing hard with the situation. After decades of having your own home and daily routines, job, health insurance, security, not to mention self-esteem, why the long face. As you get older everything we used to take for granted is harder to obtain. So, what direction to take at this time. This is my second traveling trek in five months, if no employment is obtained, the desert living with my mother, who needs help due to physical problems, will be the option for the winter. Gratitude takes an entirely new meaning when you depend on other people for shelter. This is definently a path one wouldn’t willingly chose to live. Make the best of your situation, this phrase helps uplift and encourage. Are you kidding? After awhile even what others may think is a blessing, can be excrutiating. Step back, define what your goals are for the next four years. Right now taking a long span of time to make goals is not going to work. Get over how especially your children feel about the situation you may have at this time. For a couple of decades children see their mother as complete support, strength, caring, and every thing else, however, when the parent is the one not stable or maybe erractic, what does that mean? All I know is, personally I’m running out of time and need to settle into a new life. This will make us respectable again and self worth will heal. Consider a difficult time in your life as learning experiences, because they are not in the plan you had for yourself. Did the plan get lost or just folded in so many directions we can’t see the correct routes to take anymore. Life is what we make it, but what has to be added to this phrase is, we get negative help and directions we don’t expect. In other words, DETOURS. Now this is our test in life, how we manage these little or large detours. No words of wisdom coming through at this time, maybe later. We are women with the capacity to love, nuture, be sensitive, compassionate, all of this comes naturally to us. We are givers not takers and just don’t see the "I" but the "we". Everyday is new so let’s make the best of it and get out there, conquer what ever the trials are you have and regain all the strength, wisdom, self-esteem that has carried through all the hard times previously. We can make our lives better, even if it takes some time and energy. Honestly, saying we aren’t given anything we can’t handle and what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger will help. Keep up the good work out there, no one is completely alone. We are in this together.

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