Vintage: The New Old

Since everyone seems to be crazy for vintage items, here's a new way to think about old.

by Allie Robbins • Member { View Profile }
Photograph: iStock

Vintage. A hip, cool term used to sell everything from fashion to cars to furniture. We love vintage. I love vintage. But who are we kidding? Vintage is just a nicer way of saying “old.” So, with that in mind, I've decided to take some common sayings and replace the word “old” with “vintage” just to see how they sound:

If it's too loud, you're too vintage.

You're only as vintage as you feel.

I'm much too young to feel this damn vintage.

I'm getting too damn vintage for this shit.

(my apologies for the profanity in the previous 2, but the PG version just wasn't as funny)

Who you callin' vintage?

I have socks more vintage than you.

You're not getting vintage, you're getting better.

I'm 50 years vintage, thanks for asking.

Can you think of any other sayings that would be well suited to using “vintage" in place of “old”? Let me know!

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