Was It A Kiss Or A Kiss Off?

Her 18-year-old son blows her a kiss from the baseball field and makes her day. Or did he?

by claudia stagg • More.com Member { View Profile }
Photograph: iStock

On April 10, at 10:03 on a Monday morning, my first born turned 18. All day long, I felt a little nostalgic and, admittedly, a bit melancholy, as I remembered that rainy day so filled with sunshine.   

As I went about my business on this day, I recalled how happy I felt 18 years ago with my 9 pound, 10 ounce bundle of joy in my arms, how I marveled at every move. Just where did all that time go?

My mind flashed back to some of those touching moments that have lead my son to his first day of adulthood — from the many “firsts” of his life to this year of college searches. His messy room, mumbling words, unkempt beard and other annoying habits of late seemed to wash away this Monday as I beamed with pride thinking about the man he is suddenly turning in to.     

That afternoon, my husband Bob and I went to his varsity baseball game, the first one I've been able to attend in his last high-school season. This time, I watched my first baseman with a different eye. 

Early on in the game, his eye caught mine as I sat in the third row. I could not believe what I was seeing. Did I actually see my boy just blow a kiss to me?   

I immediately shared that thought with Bob. “Are you sure it was a kiss?" he asked gently. “Maybe he had an itch. Or maybe the sun was in his eyes."     

Despite the alternatives, I would not be convinced otherwise. After all, at one time, he was a very sensitive kid. It didn’t matter that I hadn’t seen this public display of affection from him for many, many years. 

Still beaming with pride, an inning or two later, I timidly raised my hand a few inches to wave to him as if we were sharing secrets. Surprisingly, his snarly look told me that maybe waving to him was not the coolest thing a mom could do. The team went on to finish the game, with a one-run loss. 

That night, when all was quiet, I mustered up some courage to hear the words with my own ears. “Did you blow a kiss at me at the game today?” I asked lovingly. At that very moment, I realized it was a place I did not need to go. His emphatic “No” and his body language were enough to make me realize that I had just made a huge mistake.    

It was then when I had my "ah ha" moment — maybe that kiss was meant for the line of girls sitting right behind me.  

Congratulations on turning 18, my son. May your road into adulthood be a smooth one for both of us.            

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