So, it’s Monday. The big bad wolf of the work-week has returned (so soon?!) to bite you in the ass. I had a very ... eventful day today. That’s putting it lightly. Today on a scale of cluster-fuckiness from 1-100 was about ... 10,000,000. That sounds about right.
So, needless to say, I need this Monday Mood Lifter. I need it more than AIR. I miss its musk. When I saw the first one below, I literally thought it had been written by someone in my office, watching me nibble at a ham sandwich fighting off frustration. Sometimes I honest-to-god wish that real life had computer elements I use daily. What I wouldn’t give for an undo, delete, or the occasional #FU.
Enjoy, my favorite tweets that made me feel like I maybe shouldn’t jump off the twenty-fourth floor when Occam’s razor decided to fillet my sanity, then eat it with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.
@funnyordie Mel Gibson crashed his Maserati in Malibu. This all feels anticlimactic w/o audio of him saying something racist to an OnStar operator.
@rainnwilson Happy Birthday Steve Carell! You’re a 47 year old big hairy triangle of a torso. But what a torso!
@StephanAtHome i was shocked fox news had such old viewers considering all their young, hip ads for walk-in bathtubs and mesothelioma lawyers.