Fall is when many moms are busy making a list of all the things every teacher should know about their child. And not only do moms spend days on this list, they honestly believe that a teacher who averages six classes a day with sometimes 30 kids each actually remembers every child’s name, quirk, allergies, sleeping schedule, or has time to remember Heather’s dad was a math genius so she only may appear to be numerically challenged.
The fact is teachers don’t need to know how special, needy, wonderful, talkative, sweet, quiet, smart or moody our kids are. They don’t need to know what motivates them or scares them or excites them. They don’t need to know their dad is president of a bank or their mom is a VIP at a tech start-up. They just need your kids to show up to class on time happy, well fed, awake and if necessary, properly medicated.
But that doesn’t stop moms from scheduling times with overworked teachers to impress upon them that their child requires special attention, consideration, kindness, gentleness, favor and allowance for behavior. So before you book your next appointment with your teacher, here is some information the teacher doesn’t need to know: 1. Your child has difficulty reading. 2. Your child can’t sit next to a specific person. 3. Your child doesn’t like to write. 4. Your child doesn’t like math. 5. Your child is super friendly. 6. Your child is withdrawn. 7. Your child embarrasses easily. 8. Your child tries really hard. 9. Your child has a phobia about cats. 10. Your child doesn’t like bread crust, 11. Your child is left-handed. 12. Your child likes to sit in front of the class. 13. Your child only likes audio books. 14. Your child’s father doesn’t help around the house. 15. Your son doesn’t like to cut and glue things. 16. Your child freezes up during tests. 17. Your child gets her feelings hurt easily. 18. Your child is a left-brain learner. 19. Your child’s Facebook page. 20. Your child thinks the teacher hates him.
The bottom line is that no matter how special you think your child is, it’s best to let the teacher make his or her own assessment. Kids behave differently when expectations are different. If you convince your kids’ teachers that your kids are unable to cope without divine intervention, congratulations, you’ve convinced them your kids are morons.
Your job is to be a parent. Your child’s job is to learn. The teacher’s job is to teach. Amazing things can happen without your interference.
Harry H Harrison Jr. is a NYTIMES best selling parenting author with over 3.7 million books in print. He has been interviewed on over 25 television programs, and featured in over 75 local and national radio stations including NPR. His books are available in over thirty-five countries throughout Western Europe, Eastern Europe, Norway, South America, China, Saudi Arabia and in the Far East. For more information visit www.fearlessparenting.com.