Ready for the Inner Sexiness Makeover?

Are you looking for a way to exude sexiness but get uncomfortable in sexy clothes? Try a new approach – the sexiness makeover from the inside out.

Pamela Tames


Oprah online did a piece called "Hello, Sexy!" 


Well, “Hello back at you!” I thought as I read the article. “You must be reading my blog because I am so about getting the sexy on.”


In fact, I think about it only 50,000 times a day. And gosh darn here I go again.


The Oprah series showed some spectacular before and after sexy makeovers. You look at the before shot of one woman who says she “lost her sexy.” And, I hate to say it but it’s true.  She looks like a zombie mom in her before shot, dressed in Adidas sweats (the original ones, from the 70’s), and a t-shirt that fits like a muumuu. 


Oprah says, "We’ve done enough shows over the years to know that when a woman shuts down her sensual side, she loses a vital and powerful part of herself."  There’s no question that this woman has lost more than her sexy – she’s lost her self, her identity, her style, her spark plugs, and her smile. 


But then, here comes the after shot, preceded, of course, by a creative director, a beauty director, a celebrity stylist, a hairstylist to the stars, a makeup artist, and eyebrow expert.


Suddenly zombie mom looks like she wouldn’t be caught dead in anything less than D&G, Jimmy Choo, and at least enough hair product to shellac her three adorable Corgies.


Yes, I’m gearing up for a mini-rant here. Though I love and endlessly adore Oprah, I’m a little riled by this piece.


I know Oprah knows better than to ever mislead by suggesting sexy is just a matter of expensive stuff to buy and apply. She knows it’s attitude, too, according to an article that notes, “Sexiness is more about attitude than clothing, so wipe your mind of any age bias and think young.”


It’s the “think young” that gets me. I’m done with thinking young; I’ve entered the “think me” phase of my life. And those outrageous makeovers – is that’s what’s required to look sexy these days?


The makeovers remind me of that scene in the movie Awakenings, the story of a group of patients who contracted sleeping-sickness after World War I. Frozen in a decades-long sleep, they were given up as hopeless until given the drug, L-DOPA, which had an amazing, explosive, "awakening" effect.


But then the drug stopped working and they returned to the deep freeze, hopefully all memory of having just experienced their own death being quickly obliterated.


Which brings me back to the “sexy” makeovers. What are you when the dress and the makeup and yes, even the shoes, come off? Do you want a sexiness that depends on a bunch of external stuff or something deeper and enduring?


You know where I’m going. We’re not dolls whose paint needs freshening up after so many decades of being tossed around by life. We’re feeling, thinking women who want to press reset and take everything we’ve experienced and learned about life and renew ourselves at a higher level.


We want to strip down to our essential selves because that’s where the true beauty hides – along with the confidence and honesty, the humor and wisdom, and yes, the sexiness that is our very own and has nothing to do with what outfit you’re wearing.


Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for dressing up. But to suggest that’s what it takes to look sexy? I’m not buying. I don’t know about you, but I’ve struggled my whole life to be seen for who I am. Why would I come this far only to have a dress upstage me now and steal my sexy thunder?


First Published Sun, 2009-08-16 16:06

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