We Hear You! Letters from Our February 2013 Issue

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by MORE • Editors
katie couric image

Darn it, Lesley.  You made me cry in public at 37,000 feet over somewhere the other night when I read your editorial called Dreams from my daughter.

I, too, am getting ready to send our daughter off to college in the fall and I am so not ready although she is and that's what matters most.

Attached is a letter I wrote a couple of years ago when she turned 16 and flew off on a vacation by herself.  When it was my turn to go off to college I never looked back, I never thought about how my parents felt, I just kept going and loved every minute of my freedom and my new life ahead of me.  So, that's what I keep reminding myself about so I can get through what will be a very difficult time when we pull away and leave her at school in August.

LOVE your magazine, LOVE your editorials, and keep up the great writing and articles, etc.
--Nancy Nachman-Silverman

 I received MORE as a Christmas gift. It is so different from other "women's" magazines. the articles are insightful and I want to read every one of them.  More has so much more than lipstick ads and what dress will look well on hippy figures. Please continue this good work- You have me for life!!

I read with great interest the very informative subject article, presenting statistics, percentages, and heartfelt comments from both sides of the issue.  I may have overlooked it, but one large number missing was that of the 55,000,000 lives that have been aborted.  As I watched the Walk for Life on EWTN, I felt that number should have been included in the article.
 --Norma T. Dite
 

My assistant and I were excited when we discovered our first issue of More, thinking it would be a good magazine for patients in our small midwestern clinic. After reading the February 2013 issue, however, I was disappointed. We have a lot of older patients who would have been shocked by the short article that translated the beautiful words of past writers into ugly sexting. I realize this magazine is for younger, more sexually liberal women, but you would likely sell more copies with the good articles you have would speak to every woman.
--Cheryl Hodde
 

I’m a big fan/ supporter of MORE. I thrilled at the arrival of a new month of pages to read.
 
This arrival like no other, I instantly view most pages & stop when instantly interested & know that I will review every page at a later date. The current issue Vol. 16 , Jan. 2013: Roe verses Wade. I cannot even read the pages....
 
How can ANYONE tell me what to do with my body! Not a man or Dr., nobody. My Husbands sister is a born again & preaches against pro choice. I am constantly disgusted that some women approve control of others choice.
 
I recently had a friend that had never voted due to upbringing & no interest. Because I told him about the right for women to have a choice. He voted for the 1st time at 40 years old because of my explanation & his understanding that NOBODY should tell anyone that they cannot choose what to do with their body. I was so proud to have influenced a vote.
 
Go Democrats, protect the female CHOICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
--Pro female choice

I was really disappointed to see the piece called "If great poets sexted..."  This was in bad taste, and I am sure that many of your readers found it to be downright offensive.

The Roe v Wade article was really interesting, but I can't understand why the editors did not remove the name of the physician that was mentioned in Ginger Thew's submission.  Publishing his name could put him and/or his staff in danger.  

Please use more common sense when reviewing what to publish in this magazine.  
--Jane Shepard
 

I don't use Facebook so an old fashioned email will have to do: On a recent morning at my gym I picked up the February 2013 issue of More, to read while I warmed up on the treadmill. I happened to read your column, Dreams of My Daughter, and smiled when I saw your daughter's name. My daughter is named Lake, too. She turned 30 in the fall and is pregnant with her first child. It was fun to read your column and think back to when "our Lake" was finishing high school and all the milestones she has passed since then.

Now I will be a grandmother for the first time and want to maintain the balance I've always sought, of being there when she needs me without interfering with the way she choses to live her life, which now includes how she choses to raise her children. I am happy to say we have a close relationship, one based on mutual trust and respect, so I expect the rewards of having Lake in my life will continue to accrue.

Good luck to you and your daughter as she makes her way in the next phase of her life, and you in yours.

Best regards,
--Myra Serrins

My wife shared your article with me - I enjoyed it.  I am planning college tour to the Bay Area over Spring Break.  I can really relate, so thanks
--John

I just received the Feb. 2013 issue of More. Most of the time I am impressed with the content of the magazine and appreciate reading articles of quality.  However I must say that your standards have really been lowered with articles like "If great poets had sexted....."., page 26. If I wanted to read "WTF",  "CW 2 get u hard" and "Wanna tie u up, spank u, lick ur arms, legs, face n toes"  kind of rubbish, I can pick up a rag or look on the internet for free. You are so much better than this! The author not only lowered More's standards, but insulted famous poets, and More's readers. I pay for a quality magazine, please respect my intelligence and maturity.
--Marilyn Hansen

MORE is an enjoyable magazine that I look forward to browsing. But today I didn't get very far before noticing your ad with a picture of Andy McDowell's face....and not a line in it.  This isn't us. In fact, in my world, it is called a lie. Then I just read about the evolution of the single girl...SINGLE WOMEN ON TV. More lies! This is about devolving....not progress. Take a look at the Proverbs 31 woman and see what you can do with that.
 --Sabra K. Bruning

I am 49 years old and started reading More a few years ago when I found Health magazine to be a bit too young for me.  I've enjoyed the articles in More and really feel like they are age appropriate for me.  
I've never written in with reader feedback before but I just finished the article in the October issue (yes, I'm a little behind) titled "On the brink of making a billion" about Jessica Herrin and wanted to give some.  I am all for hearing about successful women and how they become so.  Good for her!  I am not pleased to read an article touting the success of a multi-level marketing scheme.  The way these MLM businesses work is that the top people get very wealthy and the bottom people drain their savings to succeed and eventually have to drop out.  MLMs feed on finding more and more lemmings.  I currently have a friend at the bottom of an MLM and try as I may to convince her to cut her losses and get out now, she will not and is determined to succeed.  I really wish these home businesses could restructure themselves and offer healthcare and a base salary plus commissions, instead of a cut going to your superior and so on and so on.  I have no idea how to make that kind of change though.  Anyways, I was disappointed that this article glorified an MLM.  I think the article is a disservice to women looking for flexible ways to earn money.
--Suzanne Y

I had to respond to the Katie Couric article in the February 2013 issue of More magazine.
I am not typically interested in Katie whether it is in the news or in her current role as a talk show host but I read the article anyway. She "had me" up until the story about Ms. Couric trying to abolish the father- daughter dance tradition at her daughter Ellie's grade school. Earlier in the article she described herself as being a "very empathetic and caring person." I find that rather hypocritical as she apparently wants to take away that memory for all the little girls at that grade school. That does not show empathy or care in my opinion.
Couldn't Ms. Couric have found a brother, uncle, or close male friend to step in to that male figure role for one night so her daughter didn't feel so left out? With that thinking, why don't we cancel Father's Day because after all many people no longer have their fathers. I think it is ludicrous for Ms. Couric to try to control her daughter's life in such a manner because the reality is there will be many moments in both of their lives that will remind them of their sad loss. Her daughter will need to find a way to cope with those times in a positive way.
I wish them both well. I also wish all little girls to enjoy their fathers where and when they can so they will have a lifetime of memories.
Sincerely,
--Nadine M. Compisi

Oh the pain of letting go with love!

My own daughter never went away to boarding school and so her launch into university life was tumultuous at best for all of us. Raised by working class parents, she has launched herself into the scariest dream for us. My husband and I have always had our feet planted firmly on the ground, yet here our own daughter pursues a dream so big, so outside of our own experience we find ourselves terrified cheerleaders. Worry not, Lesley (her love of Anne Boleyn and the other wives of Henry VIII mean she would love your name) your girl will do as ours is doing...finding her own way and missing her Mamma all at the same time. When ours makes it into a young artist program and eventually applies to Juilliard, maybe we can exhale. Maybe you too, will find that you have done your job well and it is truly is all up to her now. All the best.
--Kimberly Blair

Please, More. There is nothing candid or coy about Kathie Couric.  She marches to the sound of money -- she works for the highest bidder.  She ruined the Olympics in Italy, we had to endure that nasal voice through network news, and now she's clouding up daytime television.  Only good thing is she's running out of time slots and networks.  Good thing cable is here -- she can sell shapewear at 4 am.
--N. Kay Noffsinger

Please unsubscribe me and refund my subscription.  Your article "Sister Pact" with carefully written suicide instructions was so far from appropriate I no longer wish to have anything to do with this magazine.  That combined with the unbearable bully, Katie Couric, being your idea of a cover girl is just too much.
--Rebecca Page

Hi...I've been an avid reader and now subscribe (also gifted my daughter-in-law who likes MORE very much).  I devour every page of each issue but I wish...I wish:

I'm an 82 year old who doesn't feel or look it and I'd relish seeing some references to 'older women'...40 or 50 year olds are not what I'd call older women.  We ladies do have a life, you know?  Or do you think we're dried up w/one foot in the grave?

We're able to walk, talk and 'get around'.  As?  My husband and I moved to Qingdao China when we were 72 and worked there for 2-1/2 years.  Lots of older women do that and more...MORE.    

A few hints, tips, etc. would certainly be welcome.
 --Vasca

I used to subscribe to your magazine.  I was very excited about a publication for older women.  It quickly occurred to me, however, that I am not at all like the woman you are trying to reach.  You seem to cater exclusively to career women who make selfish decisions all about themselves.  I pity the families of these women, if they have any.  I can't imagine anyone wanting to be with the harridans you seem to chase.  I have a college degree.  I am a published author.  I chose to work part-time and raise our son.  I am happy and aging beautifully.  Why don't you ever write or publish anything for women like me.  It's all about choice you know.  We don't all have to be carbon copies of each other. I originally dropped my subscription when you profiled a 50-something career woman who attributed her line-free face to her night cream.  Come on.  Really.  But my decision was confirmed when I read that awful article by that awful women who chose to publicly decry dog ownership.  I might have felt a little better about it if the author said she gave some money to an animal charity, or advocated the spaying and neutering of pets.  Something.  Anything. But, no.  Let's just euthanize all the pets and have perfect homes and perfect clothes.  She is gross.  You are gross.  Women are allowed to be selfish and think of themselves but not like this.  You just don't get it.  You're like a rat in a maze running, running in an endless circle to have more and be more but you'll never really be good enough or creative enough because your moral compass is all wrong.  I would guess most of your readers are divorced. As a retired abortion provider and women's health expert I would like to voice my concern regarding the words "pro life".   All abortion providers and pro choice supporters are "pro life".  We prefer to use "anti - choice" to describe those against pro choice issues.  I am a mother, a giver of life, though I, too, once had an abortion. As a health care provider I saved and nourished the lives of my patients.  Because I believed in a woman's right to choose, and in many cases facilitated that choice, does not make me any less pro life.   I AM pro "life of the pregnant woman".  I even spent many years practicing obstetrics and cherished working with women who were continuing their pregnancies.  We in the Prochoice movement love our sisters and support them in whatever choice they make.  We are just as "pro life " as anyone but we believe in the CHOICE.  Therefore, anyone who does not support the abortion choice is more accurately labeled "anti-choice".  That is how we in the choice movement prefer to speak of those against women's reproductive rights. I hope in the future you will use the correct terms as pro life alienates those if us committed to choice and life.
--Sharon Girard

Hello More magazine: I've been a subscriber for several years now, and for the most part have enjoyed your magazine each month. A suggestion for you: perhaps it's time for to to hire some product editors who are the same age as your readers, as I doubt they could be. The "Asia Minor" spread in the Feb '13 issue was ridiculous. And appalling. For one, I'm not sure how many of your 40+ women readers are even remotely interested in 7" platform shoes. Is this Vogue or More? That was the ridiculous part. But, to feature said "geisha" inspired shoes which are modeled after Japanese foot binding practices is irresponsible and truly insulting to women. Think it through, More. You are smarter than that. You should always be striving to uplift women, not pedal products that are remembrances of women's oppression.
--Lori Baker Brown

Hello: I have been a More subscriber since you were first in print, and have evolved through my 40’s and 50’s with your magazine.  I have found the content largely informative and entertaining, and a good reflection of “maturing” women.  I would, however, like to comment on your photographs, particularly those on your cover and feature stories.  It is wonderful to see fabulous-looking women in their 40’s and 50’s, but these photos have been so completely airbrushed that these women appear entirely wrinkle free.  To me, this says: it’s ok to age as long as you don’t have any wrinkles, and look at least 10 years younger than you really are.   This seems inconsistent with the message of many of your articles  (for example, Redefining Beauty for Deeper Happiness, January 2013).   I would encourage you to show some mature beauties with a hard-earned wrinkle or two, affirming the message that looking great in your 40’s, 50’s and beyond does not necessarily equate with being wrinkle free.

Thanks.  
--Molly Adolfson

I think it is great that the pro-life women interviewed decided to carry their babies to term.  That is their decision.  My continuing problem with this issue is that they presume that what was right for them is also right everyone.  We have the freedom in this country to express our beliefs and act accordingly but we do not have to right to force others to abide by our personal belief system.  My other issue is that I rarely see anyone stepping up to the plate after a baby is born.  The same states that want to curtail abortion rights also want to cut their Medicaid budgets.  I also don't see churches and other organizations that oppose abortion offering financial services, food, housing, education and support to teen mothers that don't have any resources. Why don't we see religious organizations asking their congregations support birth control options or to take in these mothers and children for a year or at least offer some kind of support?  Why don't we see them out carrying signs insisting on financial support and improvement of foster care services?  Teen parent programs?  I guess after the baby is born, the baby is the mother's problem.  I say, do something positive and put your money where your mouth is.
--Anonymous

You would think that after 40 years of butting heads with no results to speak of, that a different question would be asked - what can be done to prevent unwanted pregnancies to begin with?

I can't agree that abortion is a valid form of birth control, but I do believe in birth control.  Why can't that be the focus - from education to the morning-after pill?  As for those horror stories of mother's who will die if they don't abort, maybe the doctors just aren't trying hard enough.
--Alice Lee Martin

I am responding to your article, "Roe v. Wade - Still Controversial After All These Years" in last month's issue.  I feel after 40 years and a horrifying 55,000,000 abortions, this issue needs to be readdressed at this time. I believe the majority of women who abort feel that is the only choice they have. So I propose that we fund pregnancy centers with the same dollar amount that we fund Planned Parenthood, and offer women a real choice. Women can choose to get all the services they need to bring their pregnancies to term at pregnancy centers, or they can choose to abort at Planned Parenthood.  That is a real choice and pro-women.  You didn't mention in your article Doe v. Bolton, the companion decision to Roe v. Wade that was handed down on the same day.  In Doe v. Bolton, abortion was legalized throughout all 9 months of pregnancy. There is definitely a war on women, but it's not coming from the places we've been led to believe. We deserve better.  And I have yet to read about the economic cost of abortion, by the loss of what would have been an additional 55 million tax payers.
Sincerely,
--Natalie De Blasi

Dear Lesley

Regarding Make over your Metabolism -Real Women, Amazing Results

I don't think so - do they have 2 jobs, a kid or parent to take care of, depression or other physical problem?

I thought not.

Let's talk reasonable here - 2 workouts a week and cut down on sugar/processed foods.

What does that yield?

How long can the women possibly keep up 5 or 6 workouts a week?

Please check on them in 1 year and see how things are going.

I am a physician and have seen many women die of cancer - they would have given anything for one more ice cream cone or piece of cheesecake.

Enough already!
--Julia Fielding

Hi Lesley,

I am an avid reader of MORE Magazine!!!  The articles resonate with me, as I am, let's just say, more than age 40, but not yet 60. I am writing to you now, regarding your February 2013 Issue.  With February being Heart Disease Awareness Month, and heart disease being the number one killer of women over all cancers combined, I was more than disappointed that there was no mention on the issue of women and heart disease in this Issue.  On a more personal level, I am a woman living with heart disease, have written a book about my journey with heart disease, entitled Can You Hear Me Now: or do I need to yell into your stethoscope?, and have dedicated myself to providing speaking engagements, fundraisers and presentations on this issue. So with that said, I guess you could say that I'm more than a little disappointed to not see an article in the February Issue dedicated to the number one killer of women, and even worse, have to yet endure four pages dedicated to cancer.  I am in no way suggesting that there be no articles or awareness to this life-altering disease.  I recently had a friend, who is a cancer survivor and advocate, state that the influx of article after article, and pink everywhere you turn, is even turning her off. Is it too much to ask that MORE Magazine provide, at the least, an article on women and heart disease during Heart Disease Awareness Month?  Actually, that boat has already sailed, so any month would do...women and heart disease isn't limited to just one month...it lasts a lifetime! Thank you.
--Cynthia S. Brown

I just got done reading the article "Spending to piss off my father". In my opinion Pam Houston needs good swift kick in the ass. The article states her father lived through the depression, which means he also lived through WWII. I'm wondering if she ever stopped to think of why her father was the way he was? Probably not. It's sad that some people never get a clue.

--Anonymous

Dear Lesley,

Nice to communicate with you!  I have and continue to be a loyal and devoted reader of More Magazine. Your articles are varied, interesting subjects, different points of view, and just Fun.

I work full time in an upbeat fast paced environment.  In the evening. before retiring, I light a Lavender candle to relax with my More Magazine.

Exactly what I did last evening. All Good, Very Interesting. Page by Page, always something new to enjoy or learn.  When I reached page 66, I was interested in the Title "The Sister pact.

The article was well written and touching, until I reached the correct formula to kill yourself. In the article, it states, take a bunch of pills with only 2 glasses of alcohol, so that you will not become nauseated

Twenty one years ago, my Beloved husband walked upstairs into our office, and committed Suicide. There must be many people sharing this Grief.

Upon reading the afore mentioned article, I wondered, Has the world become so Callous, that a sister act could be so specific without being specific, I Sincerely Appreciate your Time in reading my thoughts.
Warmest Regards,
--Ronna Salinger

Loved your fashion for grown-ups article with tricks to “whittle the middle” but it was impossible to find the Helios and Luna clothing.  Please don’t feature clothes that are impossible to find!
--Marilyn Groom

Dear More,

Are you kidding me with this garbage?  I have LOVED your magazine in the past few years because it actually had clothes, makeup, articles relevant to my life as a 47 year old mother of 4.  I have a busy 2nd career life running a memory care neighborhood in an assisted living community. 

When I started reading the February issue I could not believe my eyes...Some ridiculous crap translating the beautiful, expressions of love and passion of some of our greatest poets into some teenage/twenty something garbage text/sext language?  Really?????

I don't buy cosmo because it assumes we are all sex kittens wanting to read up on the latest tricks in bed, or how to flirt, or most embarrassing moment with your lover.

The short snippets of trivia and fun newsworthy notes in your "notebook" section are great, but give me a break!!!

I have enjoyed your magazine because it actually was worth my time, and hard earned money.  I love reading about ways to reinvent your life, or make over your metabolism.  Living without a to-do list sounds great!  That represents my diverse interests. I love to know how to dress well, have a great haircut and make sure I have enough money for retirement.

I found "If great poets had sexted to be crass, offensive, juvenile and not only a waste of space in your magazine, but completely unworthy of your readers.

I have never gotten around to actually getting a subscription to More, and now, with junk like that, I'm wondering if I should even bother.
--Lisa Hutchins

I love the magazine in so many ways. Thank you for putting your money where you keyboard is and not accepting advertising dollars from organizations that are inconsistent with the principles and images that you adopt.This is why it was so shocking to see the TArget ad on page 23 of the February issue. REALLY!? did ANYONE at the magazine even LOOK at that ad? I can't believe that the positive aging messages that you promote and the extensive effort you put in to show that women look, feel, act and are terrific at any age would exist next to an advertisement like that. Poise pads, Depends, safety coated aspirin, reading glasses, and some kind of arthritis medication? seriously? I nearly fell out of my chair. Shame on Target for thinking that is appropriate in ANY women's magazine. Shame on More for accepting that advertisement in their magazine. Wow!
--Dotti DiFiore

Dear Lesley,

I subscribe to MORE because it is one of the seven publications I relate to (subscribe to). It is perfect for women in our fifties. I really like Katie Couric in the Feb. issue, but the majority of this issue was a downer - abortion, cancer, "spending to piss of my father"

I can go on line and research abortion & cancer if I want information. The spending article was "whiny" and negative.

I hope for UPLIFTING articles which you usually do. Also, the "Skin Secrets" p. 50 was nothing more than product reviews. I didn't learn anything. Usually your beauty articles have great tips from dermatologists & cosmetologists and there's great suggestions for how to look better now, a week from now, a month from now, six months from now, etc.

I have enjoyed many other issues which is why I subscribe, but if the magazine continues to be a downer like the Feb. issue, I may not renew. I'm hoping for the great, positive stuff you usually have.  I especially like "this is what 54 looks like".  I am 56 and everyone says I look way younger than my age. I wear little makeup so I attribute it to good health, exercise, positive relationships, etc.  I'm a teacher- a regular person like most of your readers. If you'd ever want me for "this is what 56 looks like" I'm up for it!

Thanks for all the other great issues & please don't be offended by my complaints about the Feb. issue. I think after reading this you'll see what I mean about this issue. I write to you because I care about the magazine. I love reading magazines & MORE is one of my favorites.

Thanks for listening.
--Jeanne Marie Blystone
P.S.  I always enjoy reading your page !

Dear Lesley,

I am sorry, or maybe not so much; but I am incredulous at your sentiment in your February editorial with regard to your daughter and her senior year in high school aka "boarding school." Seriously? We on the West Coast typically don't cast away our offspring to school locations where we don't have to engage on a daily basis-And then think we have anything to say about their minute by minute activities....your editorial was fraught with insensitive and uninvolved parenting. I feel sorry for your family structure. A daily phone call will never take the place of nightly dinners around the dining room table discussing face to face the fears and insecurities of senior year in high school.

So, Katie Couric's daughters don't have a daddy (through no fault of hers, it must be said), so she feels compelled to go on a one-woman campaign to get rid of the father-daughter dance hosted by her older daughter's sorority. She claims she did it "on behalf of all the fatherless daughters in (her daughter's) school"-- obviously she doesn't give a fig about those for whom this event has been a cherished tradition for many years. Who does Amanda Robb think she's kidding with her fawning profile? Come on, MORE, enough with the celebrity worship already! Given your target demographic, most of your readership is undoubtedly mature enough to know better.
--Beverly Molnar
(Would have posted this myself on your VERY CONFUSING website but I couldn't figure out how, despite your proclamation that it was possible)

Just finished reading this month’s more mag.  I'm so surprised at your photographs of Ms. Couric.  For a magazine devoted to the older woman.  Why does every picture look like she is some where between. 18 and 28.  Really. I understand air brushing but please she is 56.  Why made her look like she should be on the cover of seventeen.  Very surprised at you!
--Bzackman

Dear More,

I always enjoy my monthly copy of More and look forward to it every month.  On occasion I love to recycle and pass on my magazines to friends that I think might enjoy the publication.  Last month I offered the January issue to my best friend and was shocked when she said "Oh, I am not that old yet".  Best to say I was speechless for a moment.  Being 56 and my friend being a few years older I thought about what she said after she left.  Your magazine is intelligent, thought provoking, funny, inspiring and fashionable.  I cannot imagine what she was thinking!   

I appreciate what it must take to compose and publish a monthly magazine in this day and age and my congratulations to all that contribute to your issues on a yearly basis.

I will be passing on your issues to other friends and family and please keep up the great work!
--Beth Parks

This was a very interesting article to me as I have been struggling as a Catholic since the presidential election last year with regards to the Catholic Church getting involved in the health insurance debate as to whether employers are required to pay for their employees who may have abortions or get contraceptives.  This debate caused a lot of strained relations in my extended family.  I am a mother of 2 daughters and I know they take contraceptives, initially for problems with their periods and now as they've gotten older to prevent unwanted pregnancies.  While I would rather they had waited until marriage to have sex, I know I would be naive to expect that they would follow my moral values on this as they are older than I am and still single when I had married at a younger age before I started my family.  It angered me when our parish priest practically told us how we should vote with regards to the insurance/abortion/contraception debate as I thought government/religion issues are to be kept separate.  I also don't appreciate the Catholic Church dictating to my conscience as to when I should have my babies when I am the one who knows when & how I'd be willing to handle the responsibility of raising  my children.  I think this issue boils down to women taking responsibility with their partners and not getting involved sexually until they decide how they will handle the consequences of their love life.  If you're not willing to risk an unwanted pregnancy, don't get in that position in the first place.  This may sound simplistic, but it seems we'd save ourselves a lot of emotional stress down the road.   It seems to me that only if children are wanted are their rights protected, so don't risk having them if you're not willing to be responsible for dealing with them.  This would also help alleviate the overloaded adoption/penal system of children that weren't wanted in the first place.  Can't we as intelligent human beings be more disciplined with our sexuality or are we at the mercy of our animal urges???  Sorry to get so long-winded about this, but this issue really affected me as a caring woman....thanks for listening...
--An Upset Catholic Mom in Texas…

For some reason the threat of a crippling effect to print magazines, created by the electronic age---continues to be a non-factor in my mind when it comes to a handful of titles.  Top of the list is MORE magazine.  I remember picking up my first copy of the magazine in a medical office, as I waited for an appointment with the doctor.  I was so "hooked" I didn't even get annoyed when the subscription offer postcard fell on to the floor, which is typically high, amongst my pet peeves.  I subscribed immediately and I have become responsible for many gift subscriptions over the years to the women in my life of "style and substance.”

I just finished reading the latest issue and it did not disappoint.  I don't know how you do it---but you deserve a round of applause for providing thought provoking, intriguing information and advice to the mature woman---with each and every issue!

Thank you for printing the pages that help my life!
Sincerely,
--Pamela Frazer

Congratulations on what has to be one of, if not the most fraudulent article titles I've ever been seduced by.  I'm speaking of the bold encouragement for me to discover "125 NEW WAYS TO REINVENT YOUR LIFE" on the cover of the February 2013 issue of More.  Imagine my great relief on finding that it's as simple as adding a little farro to my diet.  Presto!  A reinvented Nancy Greenway.  Hats off to your creative team for their imagination! 

Whether or not I'll ever be drawn in by another of your covers is entirely another matter.
Sincerely yours,
--Nancy Greenway

After a long and productive day at work, nice dinner and terrific conversation with my 18 year old son and 23 year old daughter, I settled into a comfortable chair to read the February edition of "More" magazine.

Within a few minutes of reading, my eye was quickly drawn to the title "If great poets had sexted...." by Linda Yellin followed by very graphic "sexting" descriptions.

Seriously?

As a parent, I recently attended an information and prevention session about this very topic and within a month I find your magazine making light of the issue of sexting.
I'm sure you are aware that this horrible pattern has begun to be prevalent in not only our adult day to day dating and relationship environment, but in high school and middle schools environments as well.

Such a poor, graphic and mostly irresponsible attempt at humor. I expect "More" from your magazine.
--Nancy Bass

This evening, I bought my first issue of MORE magazine after standing in line at a local grocery store.  I just turned 40, and I thought I should try something more grown-up than People or Us for a change.  I had no expectations of your magazine, and I settled in on the couch with it right after dinner.  I've never written to the Editor-in-Chief of any magazine before, but I really felt the need to give you and your staff some feedback after I read the story called "The Sister Pact" by Lee Woodruff.

I'm very sorry for all those who are affected by Alzheimer's Disease.  It's horrible, I know.  My Mom is 69 and has been on a slow decline for the past 10 years.  Both of her parents died from Alzheimer's so it's not surprising she also got it, and there's a chance that I'll get it, too, someday.  I've thought a lot about how that might affect my husband, because I see what a toll this has taken on my Dad, my brother and all of our extended family.  My Mom was the light of our family--a nurturer with a gentle soul and intelligent wit.  She was my best friend.  Even though her body is still here, she is gone.  I grieve for her in waves and can't imagine a worse fate for someone who was such a private, elegant, articulate person.

While I relate to the author and her sisters, and I'm so sorry for them and their parents, I think it was very irresponsible of MORE to include this passage on page 70: "[...] my doctor friend gets to the heart of the matter, the information I have asked him to provide.  We all lean intently toward the speaker phone.  'If I were going to take my life, this is what I would do,' he says, then proceeds to outline an easy way: Combine sleeping pills and alcohol and slip away painlessly. 'Lots of pills but no more than two drinks,' he cautions.  'You don't want to induce vomiting.'  The simplicity of this plan and our collective mental picture silenced us for a few beats as we search one another's faces.  Yes.  We can do this."

My husband, Kevin, and I were quite taken aback by this passage.  There are lots of people touched by Alzheimer's Disease, and not all of them have the support network that this author and her sisters have in each other.  And not everyone is as well-adjusted.  It is very depressing to watch someone you love slip away over a period of years.  I am lucky that I also have a strong support network of friends and family, and my husband always offers comforting words and a warm shoulder for me to cry on.  I also have a strong faith in God, and these things combine to help me through the pain of losing my Mom.  But if I had read this article 3 or 4 years ago, I might very well have headed out to look for sleeping pills and alcohol, not more than 2 drinks so as not to induce vomiting.  I was in a deep depression and felt very alone back then.  I bought your magazine tonight to decompress after a long work week--I was especially excited to read "Living Without a To-Do List"--so it was upsetting to find a prescription for suicide in the face of Alzheimer's Disease.

I'm sure MORE magazine has lots of loyal readers, so you have a responsibility to remove reckless and dangerous material that's submitted to you for publication.  I hope you can understand my point of view.
--Karen Froehlich

I was taking the survey online for the Feb. issue, and had spent 20 minutes or so... and my internet lost it's connection to the page I was on. I had put alot of thought into the narrative parts, so would like to know if it even went through to your staff.
 
I found this particular issue more satisfying than others in a long time. Would love to give you the feedback you are looking for but didn't want to have to start from scratch again, if I didn't have to.
 --Mary Jo Clairmont-Hansen

"I Knew I Could Never Give Away a Baby"
 
As an adoptive mother, Cate Nelson's story startled me on several levels. While I respect what every woman wants to do with their pregnancy, some of her feelings and opinions need to be challenged.
 
When my daughter's birthmother realized she was pregnant at 4 months by a one night stand, she knew she could not provide for my daughter. She was single, already had a toddler and was living in poverty. In a completely selfless act, she immediately made an adoption plan. The part of Cate's story that I would like to challenge is when she says "Children deserve mothers who choose them." This was particularly unnerving to me, because my daughter's birthmother was not "giving away" (another phrase I have issue with) my daughter because she was unwanted.  By saying that, she is not only laying a huge amount of guilt onto women who choose adoption, she is also sending a horrible and untrue message to children who are adopted.  My daughter was wanted deeply. She was wished for and prayed for by me my entire life. I could not give birth to her, I could not carry her in my body, but she is my daughter. And though her birthmother suffered sadness and grief in "giving her away" she feels strongly that she made the right choice. A selfless courageous choice. We have formed a deep and lasting bond and mutually decided to have an open adoption. She knows my daughter and has watched her grow for 8 years and will continue to have that option to be in her life forever. Their relationship is light. When they see each other they hug and giggle.  My daughter knows that she grew in her birthmother's body, but she has much more of a bond with me. And never ever will she feel unwanted.
 --Natalie Kavanaugh

First Published Wed, 2013-01-23 16:28

Find this story at:

http://www.more.com/member-voices/your-letters/we-hear-you-letters-our-february-2013-issue