As a young girl growing up in Toronto, I dreamed of being swept off my feet by a brave and handsome Prince Charming. That childlike dream of true love was wonderful but it resulted in a lot of unrealistic expectations. It didn’t take long for my idealistic vision to be replaced by a string of not-so-ideal frogs. I came to realize that falling in love is the easiest part of a relationship, staying in love is where it really gets dicey.  

On my blog I love to talk about the virtues of the Real Cougar Woman. How she’s smart, independent and überconfident. I believe that with all my heart. But at the same time, there isn’t one of us who doesn’t yearn to be loved and adored. 

Every woman has her own particular set of relationship challenges, and cougars are no exception. Men definitely are from Mars, and it is tough enough finding common ground with someone of your own generation, let alone a young guy who is trailing two decades behind you. The age difference can create all sorts of problems if you’re not prepared. You just have to keep remembering that Real Cougars are willing to do whatever it takes in the pursuit of happiness. When the bloom is off the Valentine’s rose, that’s when you have to use your smarts to keep the relationship blossoming.
 
Here are a few of cougar relationship tips the women in my Real Cougar Woman Community say have worked for them and their cubs. If you have any to add from your own experience, by all means, please comment below!
 
DO
Be flexible.  Open yourself up to new ideas in all areas of your relationship.
Live in the moment.  Focus on the relationship you have today—not 10 years from today.
Go overboard in your compliments.  Show him you are proud of his accomplishments.
Share financial responsibility.  This is essential for a strong foundation to build on.
Make him feel comfortable with friends and family.  Support your guy and he’ll support you.

Don’t
Focus on the age difference.  It’s a big turnoff and gets old very quickly.
Play games.  Be honest: He loves that you are secure enough to do that.
Mind-read.  If you want to know what he is thinking, ask him.
Play Mom.  He’s not your kid—don’t treat him like one.
Make promises you can’t keep.  Never betray his trust; tell him like it is.

Love with your younger man can be wonderful and exciting (but you didn’t need me to tell you that). So go out of your way to make him feel special. Uncork the champagne, feed him his favorite dessert, put on your new sexy black teddy and show your favorite guy just how much you appreciate him.    

Linda Franklin is the author of Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am: The Real Cougar Woman Handbook and the founder of TheRealCougarWoman.com.