I was married for just under 17 years when I decided to get divorced. It had been a long time coming, and I made the decision a few months before my 40th birthday. I always knew 40 was a milestone; a time that alot of women re-think their lives and examine if they’re really happy and if their life is where they want it to be. I knew I had been in an abusive relationship for way too long, and was finally strong enough to walk away, for my benefit as well as for my two children.
I moved into my own home in May of 2008. My girlfriends had been telling me I should try some dating web-sites, but I just wasn’t interested. It seemed to me that these were for desperate people who had a hard time meeting other people face to face. This was definately NOT a problem for me, so I didn’t think dating web sites were for me either. Well, it doesn’t matter how outgoing or personable you are, you still need the people to connect with. I’m not one to go to bars and talk to men; I did that before I met my ex, and it definately wasn’t something I was interested in at age 40. By July I had met a few men myself that just weren’t for me. I decided to create a profile on Match.com. After two plus months of getting e-mails from 20 something men and going out on a few dates with others that didn’t work out, I was a bit discouraged. I was about to end my membership when I went on one last time. I found a man who I was attracted to at first by his picture, so I clicked on his profile. I absolutely loved what he wrote. He was very straightforward and real; not like some of the others who write about themselves as men that are "too good to be true".
I sent him an e-mail telling him I liked what he wrote and and asked him to look at my profile and if he was interested to let me know. That was on October 7th 2008 and we are still together. He is the perfect man for me; intelligent, motivated, driven, successful, attentive, considerate, respectful, honest a great father and so very funny. We spend most of our time laughing. I never thought after being in an abusive relationship for so long, that I would ever find a man that truly cared for me for just being me. I know it takes many people a long time to find the "right" partner. Because of my life experiences, I knew exactly what I was looking for and was lucky enough to find it in my boyfriend. It’s been 8 months since that first e-mail and phone call and things are only getting better. He makes me so happy and has truly added joy to my life.
I am finally able to live without the worry of someone being unkind to me and making me feel unworthy. It is a wonderful feeling and I thank God everyday that he gave me the strengh to leave my marriage and to find true happiness with my boyfriend. There are always second chances in life, we just have to be brave enough to take them.