Halloween isn't what it used to be. What was once a holiday devoted to kids in cute-as-can-be costumes, it's now rated as a favorite holiday among adults, and when we say RATED, we mean X-RATED.
Sure, sure, she ascended the throne as a teen, rocked a nation and possibly ignited the French Revolution, but today's version of the so-called Queen of Fashion has gone vamp.
Ricky's Costume Superstore Marie Antoinette costume, $30; rickyshalloween.com.
A fresh take on a children's classic. Or something.
Alice in Wonderland costume, $37; halloweencostumes.com
Um, can we make a citizen's arrest?
Dirty Cop costume, $48; halloweencostumes.com
Basket? Check. Red cape? Check. Incredibly inappropriate dress with breasts hanging out? Check, check. This one isn't heading to grandmother's house.
Little Red Riding Hood plus-size costume, $31; amazon.com
Problem solved: What to wear when you are a ghost hunting parapsychologist.
Ghostbuster costume, $48; halloweencostumes.com
When you wear something like this, it's clear you're a highly trained, incredibly talented, top-level security cleared navy pilot. OBVIOUSLY.
Top Gun Flight, $49; halloweencostumes.com
Who made you do it? Oh right, right, right...the DEVIL made you do it.
Devil costume, $46; amazon.com
There's an old, filthy joke about a submarine filled with sailors, and somehow that's the only thing that comes to mind when looking at this costume. Which, we assume, is the whole point.
Sailor costume, $30; amazon.com
In today's Halloween costume landscape, even the beautiful butterfly looks like a ho.
Butterfly costume, $31; amazon.com
This would be the version that didn't quite make it into J. K. Rowling's final book.
Hogwarts Witch costumer, $48; yandy.com
We didn't think it was possible to sexualize Cookie Monster, but clearly we hadn't considered the possibility that "Cookie blue" was available in sheer illusion netting.
Cookie Monster costume, $57; yandy.com
Because a sexy hot dog would be too obvious?
Hamburger costume, $40; yandy.com
Well, we knew she had a dark side, so it's not impossible to make the leap to something dark AND trampy.
Wednesday Addams costume, $50; buycostumes.com
Prim and proper? Please! Give your form a boost with these 25 Lust-Worthy Lingerie Picks.
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