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Blaming the Victim, Resigning to Be the Victim

For the past couple of weeks I have been through a range of emotions with my son’s school and the kids who attend the school and society at large. So many things have happened this school year to my son; things that I never experienced on the level that he had. Everyone will have some teasing done in their life, if not from your own family, definitely from your peers in school. The thing is, we who were born of the seventies, sixties, and further back knew that we would survive these tangles with our peers and a lot of the times we would end up becoming best friends with them. Not anymore, these days you are lucky if you are able to walk away with your life let alone a bullet wound or stabbing scar.

On May 30th, 2009 Christopher D. Jones was killed because he was friends with members of gang that another gang did not like and now get this, he “supposedly” said something against the rival gang of his friends. He was bullied in school, his mother told the school and obviously nothing was done because his mom eventually had to transfer her son to another school and the bullying followed him. Christopher was at the pool in his neighborhood that day, and made one call to his mom letting her know he was going to be fine. When Christopher left the pool he was attacked just blocks away from his home by a gang of African-American boys whose ages range from fourteen- to sixteen-year-olds. Christopher is White and this has blown the community apart because some people who are white are outraged that this was not considered a HATE crime and they were wondering when Jesse and Al were going to come and march and shut things down.

I understand completely why they are outraged, it does seem like every time something like this happens to an African-American kid the world is outrage. You hear, “How can people still think that way, when are people going to accept one another.” Look at Jena 6 and how everyone went down to Louisiana to make a statement, where is the statement for Christopher, why should it be that African-Americans are the only one holding the Race card when it comes to situations like this. I am African-American and some who know will say hardly because I do not resign myself to think that my whole identity revolves around how Black I can be. It needs to stop period on both sides of the fence, African-Americans cannot sit and say we have been traumatized for hundreds of years in this countr as a reason to protest injustice anymore. In part II you will read why I say this, no offense to my brothers and sisters but there is an accountability that needs to come in place and fast. Someone needs to say it, learn from what I am saying or you will continue to feel the disenfranchisement more than you have ever felt before because the rest of society and the world are not going to stop and fix it for you.

The way this story has been played out in the media it seems that some are saying (blaming the victim) that when Christopher was riding his bike that maybe if he had been wearing a helmet (as kids are supposed to when they ride a bike) that maybe he would not have died after he fell down from fleeing for his life from being beaten up by a gang of boys. Young African-American boys who had something for some reason to prove to Christopher for “supposedly” saying something about their gang. Another blaming the victim game was that maybe it was a shadow boxing game gone wrong and that since he (Christopher) was not winning the “game” of two to six against one he tried to ride away, fell and hit his head. Then Christopher’s mothers’ car was broken into and people want to say that it was her fault that since the door was unlocked and that since the father left his wallet in the car they were asking for their car to be broken into. 

This whole incident has really brought out the worst in people and I am like, what can we do to ensure that no one has to die because they are friends with someone in a gang, some he said she said stuff or for just being themselves. My son is going through the exact same situation as Christopher D. Jones there are only two differences my son is African-American and he and the kids that are bullying him are in elementary school. These are ten- and eleven-year-old boys who are behaving like a bunch of I don’t know what to say. I have written on here how they have harassed my son by calling him a “Snitch” because he refused to accept a peer of his who is White calling him a “NI**&R”, it was insane.

I felt so sorry for my son to have to ride the school bus for twenty minute each way and have to listen to a group of boys telling him how wrong he was. Telling the school after awhile seemed like a joke, I was always told they took action; the kids were spoken to, blah, blah, blah. The boys never stopped, the last week of school was when my son was threatened to have the “SH*T” beaten out of him on Monday.

On Tuesday he was head butted by a boy who not only bullied him but had just the past summer stolen his bike, nothing was ever done. Wednesday his homeroom teacher thought she was being smart by placing him in detention when he had done nothing wrong and I had assurances from the principal that he would be able to attend the year end school party, he missed it. I will talk more about his teacher and how her conduct allowed for this behavior to continue in the classroom. Thursday he was dragged down the slide by the boy who called him the “N” word, it was an all out assault on my son, I kept him home until his graduation ceremony. What’s funny is that one of the boys who bullied my son really bad was awarded the Presidential Citizenship Award, What? So schools are no help to protect our children but I choose not to be a victim. No one is going to say my son deserved to have been bullied because he chooses to be himself and not run with the crowd and think treating people bad is the way to go. 

You know following that “CRap” mentality that is running rampant in the African-American community like a Cancer destroying anything and everything it touches. My grandfather and mother and everyone else from the Civil Rights era who worked and died for me, my son and all of the other African-Americans to attend a good school, have better jobs and a choice for better housing would be ashamed at how African-Americans are treating each other let alone other people. I am not having it anymore and I am starting now to make sure no one else dies because of this ridiculous non-sense …