20 of the Most Hilarious Women Right Now

by DivineCaroline

20 of the Most Hilarious Women Right Now

Despite iconic comedy characters like Liz Lemon, Leslie Knope, and Sue Sylvester, there still seems to be some debate about whether women are funny. The point was most fiercely argued by Christopher Hitchens back in 2007 in his article, “Why Women Aren’t Funny,” and since then, researchers and cultural theorists have poured entirely too much energy into determining whether women have funny bones. We’d like to clear it up for everybody right now: The answer is yes.


Kristen Wiig



“I have an announcement, too: there is a colonial woman on the wing. I saw her. There is something they’re not telling us!” —Annie, warning her fellow passengers of the old-timey, butter-churning menace she spots on the wing of the plane in _Bridesmaids_.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/sLEt2B_


Kristen Schaal



“If I were that chicken bone, I wouldn’t want to come out either.”—Kristen’s best pick-up line for that rare opportunity when you’ve just performed the Heimlich maneuver on somebody that you would like to date. From her book, _The Sexy Book of Sexy Sex_.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/uJCHQu_


Tina Fey



“The difference between male comedy writers and female comedy writers is that the male ones are taller and weigh more. They also fake-rape each other more. Female comedy writers pretty much never fake-rape each other. The women comedy writers do not urinate in cups around the office.” —Tina elaborating on the nuanced differences between the sexes in “Esquire magazine”:http://www.esquire.com/features/tina-fey-funny-quotes-040710.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/rCJZSi_


Chelsea Handler



“Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn his eyebrows off.” —From her book _Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang._

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/ukB8dF_


Sarah Silverman



“When God gives you AIDS—and God does give you AIDS, by the way—make lemonAIDS.”—From her movie _Jesus Is Magic._

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/v7lZNG_


Amy Poehler



“You know what’s always sexy? Fingerless gloves.” —Leslie Knope demystifies the feminine mystique.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/u1sIYX_


Ellen Degeneres



“I’m getting good at yoga. My downward dog is so good, I can’t show it on daytime television.”

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/vIACpD_


Ellie Kemper



“Disposable cameras are fun, although it does seem wasteful and you don’t ever get to see your pictures. If it’s an important event that you want to remember, I recommend using a real camera.”—As Erin on _The Office._

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/sZZWgG_


Aubrey Plaza



“I’m Janet Snakehole. I’m a very rich widow with a terrible secret. Who are you?” –As April Ludgate on _Parks and Recreation._

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Jane Lynch



“I will haunt your dreams.” —As the uncomfortably forward branch manager Paula in _The 40-Year-Old Virgin_.

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Mindy Kaling



“I swallowed a tape worm last night. It’s going to grow up to three feet inside of me and then it eats all of my food so that I don’t get fat.”—As the always-on-a-diet Kelly Kapoor on _The Office_.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/uCXx83_


Anna Faris



“God I want to lick your skin off.” —As the brain-dead, sexually enthusiastic pop star, Samantha James, in _Just Friends_.

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Amy Sedaris



“I’m not adopted and I’m not an Indian; it’s just coincidence that I have a love of gambling and booze and a knack for catching syphilis.”—As the forty-six-year-old ex-junkie prostitute, now-high-school student, Jerri Blank, in _Strangers with Candy_.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/uE0Uvn_


Melissa McCarthy



“I fell off a cruise ship … I met a dolphin down there. And I swear to God, that dolphin looked not at me, but into my soul. Into my Goddamn soul, Annie. And said, ‘I’m saving you Megan.’ Not with this mouth, but he said it, I’m assuming telepathically.”—Megan relives the most important moment of her life in _Bridesmaids_.

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Leslie Mann



“Let’s get some fuckin’ French toast!”—Delivering the perfect “I’m just about to puke in your face” line as Nicky, Steve Carrell’s drunk-driving, shellfish-loving date in _The 40-Year-Old Virgin_.

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/udyPaT_


Elizabeth Banks



“I love this restaurant. It’s one of the few places in New York with a veal tank.” —As Avery Jessup in _30 Rock._

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://bit.ly/u6AuOU_


Maya Rudolph



“I just took a shit in the middle of the street.” —As Lillian in _Bridesmaids._

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Christina Applegate



“Jazz flute is for little fairy boys.”—Anchorman’s Veronica Corningstone goes for the guttural in responding to Ron Burgundy’s threat to punch her in the “baby maker.”

_Photo source: “Wikimedia Commons”:http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:ChristinaApplegateGGJan09.jpg_


Carrie Brownstein



“Every time you point, I see a penis.”—Toni, the feminist bookstore owner on _Portlandia_, explaining to a customer why she should put her finger away.

_Photo source: PR Photos_


Jane Krakowski



“I did not hit that Asian page. I was just swinging my arm and she walked into me, twice.”— Jenna Mulroney defending her honor on _30 Rock_.

_Photo source: PR Photos_