John Mayer is many things: A talented singer and songwriter, the inspiration behind a T-Swift song, one of the leading guitarists of our time, and quite possibly one of Hollywood's most notorious serial daters. (Reminder: a complete list of all women he's dated). What we didn't expect on his list of talents was "Closet Beauty Expert." Surprised? Us, too.
He's calling this new endeavor "Skin Care Secrets With John," and posted a hilarious beauty tutorial to his Snapchat story that puts even Kylie's latest makeup posts to shame. And to be honest––the guy has a pretty intense night-time skincare routine. (Well, kinda.)
"You know, a lot of people ask me, 'John, what are some of your skincare secrets?'" the singer shared on his Snapchat story on Wednesday. "And I always say, that's an odd question to ask me, and they always say you literally just asked me to ask you that."
Then, he starts off a hilarious and unexpected skincare tutorial that he claims to follow religiously. Behold:
Hack Number 1: Always apply your bottled product directly onto your face.
He refers to this method as DAT, short for Direct Application Technique. He believes that with "DAT", the risk of losing valuable lotion is very low, since it won't get stuck in the cracks of your hands. We didn't even think that was a thing, but at $590 a bottle we can see how those extra finger creases could get expensive.
He also adds that his favorite skincare brand is Natura Bissé, a brand he "has a feeling is used mainly by people in their 60s and 70s," but he loves it anyway.
Hack Number 2: Use eye concentrate instead of moisturizer.
In our new favorite beauty vlogger's professional opinion, our expert asserts his claim that eye creams are just a higher quality version of facial moisturizer. That said, they are almost always more expensive and according to the musician, get the job done even better. He argues that we obviously should just apply it all over our face. (If you're into that, check out these best eye creams for every purpose.)
Hack Number 3: The offset smile.
Don't worry––that's not some complex beauty term you've been missing out on, it's just Mayer's preferred application method. In the next installment in his Snapchat story, the singer takes a bottle of Vitamin C and E Complex and squirts two dots on his upper lip and then applies several small dots on his chin to make a smiley face. As we can see, he's really putting his creativity to use here.
Hack Number 4: Find a way to spray Natura Bissé's Diamond Mist Spray on your skin, indirectly.
But how is that even possible? Well, the last step of Mayer's intense night time regiment involves him spraying his favorite mist into the air in front of him, and then simultaneously head butting his face into it. We're not convinced that any product costing $92 a bottle should be wasted in thin air, but if it keeps this heartthrob happy, than who are we to judge?
Even though it was refreshingly fun to see Mayer trying his hand in the skincare world, it's safe to say his true talents still lie in music. Speaking of which, can he just drop another album already?