7 WTF Fashion Trends You Won’t Believe Are Making A Comeback
by Bethany Lozier
Trends come and go. But these trends should just go. From fanny packs to the return of the whale tail, we’re pretty weirded out by these fashion fads.
We all know fashion is cyclical for better or for worse. Trends come and go with the seasons, and we’re really pumped when fugly fashion hits the road… until it pulls a u-turn right back into our lives.
Even if you’re always down to try the latest fashion fad, these are a few trends you may want to steer clear of to avoid utter public humiliation (but hey, you do you).
Unless you’re a professional gardener, you have no purpose wearing these perforated plastic abominations in public. While their comfort is indisputable, they’re also unnecessary unless a small child is sporting them on the playground. Also, even when covered in high-quality fur, they’re not cool. Won’t you sweat through the holes anyway?
2. Juicy Couture Velour Tracksuits
It’s not 2007 anymore, but Juicy and Urban Outfitters don’t seem to care. We all wore these fuzzy, form-fitting pants and jackets in our middle school days, but that’s where they need to stay. Desperate Housewives is off the air and even our fave celebs aren’t wearing them anymore, so neither should we.
3. The Return Of The Whale Tail
Yes, you heard that one right. Whale tails, or better known as exposed thongs, are trying to come back into our lives like a pesky ex. First of all, thongs are already the bane of existence for many underwear wearers out there, so why would you want to flaunt your unmentionables for the whole world to see? Thanks, but no thanks.
4. Fanny Packs
Maybe your mom never stopped using hers on family trips, but lucky for her, fanny packs are back on the market with a vengeance, like this one from Urban Outfitters. While they can be stylish under the right circumstances, unless you’re going to a festival or a wild theme park, you don’t need one to carry your shizz. Settle for a functional cross body or a chic handbag like a functioning member of polite society, plz.
5. Sky High Platforms
In the words of the ever-relevant Cher Horowitz from Clueless, “You try driving in platforms.” Go on, give it a go and tell us how it went! Probably not good, right? While a slight platform heel is indeed très chic, when your shoes rival the height of a double-decker bus (like these from NET-A-PORTER), it’s time to rethink your choices.
Behold, the ultimate in dad footwear. You get extra points if you rock these babies in white socks year round. While the comfort level of Birkenstocks is exponential, can anyone really call these Jesus-style shoes fashionable? But hey, if you invest in a pair (like these from Birkenstock), maybe you’ll be able to walk on water.
7. Waist Cinchers
Bet you never thought a new take on the corset would make an appearance in high fashion, did ya? While this may be one of the more puzzling trends to surface out of New York Fashion Week, it certainly reiterates the notion that nothing ever goes out of style forever, even when it really should.