As I was sitting in the bathtub this evening I was wondering why they don’t teach the truly important things in school. To be quite honest, I’m not sure I would have believed any of it, sitting behind my student desk. I keep wondering things like, why don’t they tell you parenthood is way tougher than you can imagine? It is true, it is one of the best experiences this life has to offer. But on the flip side, the stress, frustration, worry, and anxiety, are all emotionally taxing on your soul. (Not to mention the little tots are taxing on the pocketbook.) They are also taxing on your marriage or whatever relationship you seem to have with your child’s other parent. Gone are the days of spontaneous, well, anything. Drinks after work? Gone. Last minute trips to the city for a weekend of late nights and acting like a teenager? Gone. Sleeping past 5:30 a.m., heck sleeping more than thirty minutes at a time? Not a chance. I’m just saying a warning would have been nice. And like the teenagers my daughters will turn into, I would have thought any adult who said, “You just can’t understand being a parent until you are one” was just saying one of those things adults say. But now that I am one of those adults, I have to say, they were right. Maybe the teenage years (during high school is what I am getting at) are not the right time. Is there a right time? Well, no.
Call me a Debbie Downer, but when I have a friend who is expecting their first child, I am the first one to say things like, “YES, childbirth hurts!” Having kids will change your life FOREVER, for better or worse. (Maybe children should come with a set of vows. Let’s face it. Children are a WAY bigger commitment than marriage. Divorce? Available for a fee. Abandoning your children? I don’t think so)
On to my first thoughts, you will no longer be the fun-loving, cute self you once were. Your body is pretty much trashed for awhile and you will wonder what the hell you were thinking. If your husband so much as comes near you with that look in his eye for at least the first year of your child’s life, you will beat him with a stick. Now let me defend myself. I love my children MORE than life itself. I would do anything, anything for them. Which is more than I could have said for anyone else before they were born. So changes, yes. They are in store; most of them glorious and wonderful. Maybe even a little bit of changes in the form of maturity. But take a warning, parenthood is not all that it is cracked up to be. I think everyone who wants a child should have one. But I also think pregnancy should come with a black box warning ( you know, like on cigarette boxes ) of what’s ahead so when that baby comes out, it doesn’t reach up and slap you in the face!