We have all had them, times when we were sick, sad, grieving, angry, anxious, stressed, in pain or truly depressed. How do we handle it all, let’s be real, lets talk about it! Well, I think those two things I mentioned are crucial to surviving those really challenging times in our lives. Mothers are real people, they have real challenges, they are not super heroes and nor should they be! Accepting ourselves and all that we are including everything, the good, the bad and even the ugly is the key to emotional wellness. Actually I’m not a believer in “the ugly” I have worked really hard at trying not to label my emotions as “good and bad” I think all the emotions are wonderful. This is a very helpful tool when working through a challenging time in our lives. Accepting the emotions as they come up and not labeling them. This is a perfect example of how working with ourselves and our emotions will in turn help in every area of our lives. We will be able to accept our children’s emotional ups and downs better, if we accept and understand our own! I am a true believer in an emotionally healthy mom is the best mom she can be and that seems to be what I hear the most … mom’s want to be at their best for their kids!
As I said earlier, talking about it is also an important tool during difficult times. I know it is not always easy to talk about the most challenging stuff in our lives and for some personalities it is even harder … but everyone has at least one person they can be totally honest with. Call that trusted person, meet them for lunch or at the park, get together and share your true self. Honestly I’ve been there, done that and survived. Often people worry if they take the cork off the bottle and let it all out, they will fall apart, they won’t be able to pull it back together. I have never seen this to be true. It always helps to let the steam out of that simmering pot, share, be validated, and move forward!
During Challenging Times …
1. Go within and locate what is truly bothering you
2. Accept what ever emotion or thought that comes forward
3. Confide in that trusted person or group of people
4. See or talk to a trusted professional
5. Be honest with yourself and your family about what is going on with you
6. Yes, this includes our children. Being honest with our children models acceptance of self, models that no one is “perfect”, models that emotions are healthy and good, models good self care … what great “lessons”
7. Take it easy, don’t force yourself to “pull yourself up by your boot straps”
8. LOVE YOURSELF, YOU ARE LOVABLE!