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Beware the Tooth Fairy Authority Mom

I’ve tried not to set the bar too high with the Tooth Fairy. One minute you’re slipping a twenty dollar bill into a tooth fairy pillow and the next minute you’re renting a stretch Hummer for your kid’s eight birthday party. My seven-year-old, Miss C, received five shiny gold dollar coins for her first lost tooth, but her latest lost tooth brought a crisp dollar bill. Nothing extravagant, but no loose change and lint from the couch cushions either.

Miss C went to a birthday party at a gymnastics center on a recent Saturday and when I dropped her off she was showing off her new gap-tooth smile. One of the moms said, “Oh, what did the tooth fairy bring you?” and Miss C told her she got a dollar.

Apparently this mom just could not leave well enough alone. She was a self-professed Tooth Fairy Authority. “You know there are lots of tooth fairies don’t you?” she asked Miss C.

Miss C, who has been brought up on the sole reigning Tooth Fairy theory, looked over at me confused. “Noooo,” she answered timidly.

“Well,” the mom explained. “How do you explain why different kids get different amounts of money from the tooth fairy?’

Uh, thanks lady.

My comeback was a good one, I think. “Well Santa does have his elves, so maybe the Tooth Fairy has helpers, too!”


Come on fellow moms. I don’t know how much longer Miss C is going to believe in the magic of the Tooth Fairy. I’m sure some of her school friends have already hinted around that they don’t believe the Tooth Fairy is real. I know some parents don’t play along with the fantasy, but I want Miss C to embrace innocent childhood magic for as long as she can. Before long the sparkly aura of faith in the unimaginable will fade along with her belief in Santa and the Easter Bunny. Don’t screw things up for her. I won’t inject my theories into your Tooth Fairy stories if you won’t inject yours into mine. Deal?

Nashvillian Jamie Reeves has been pontificating about poop and pinot noir on since 2005.

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