Children and familys in incest

by Heather Swick

Children and familys in incest

I am a mother of two children who I love and adore however the lives we had were shattered almost two years ago when we discovered that my eldest child had committed the worst sin ever but also had that sin done to him. This has been the most challenging painful situation a mother could ever face.


I do ask that judging the decisions made be minimal because if you thought fully on how you yourself would truly handle the same situation because this was by far an easy one you just might have a different approach.. The reason I am writing this is so other families out there that feel they are alone or feel hopeless realize that they are not alone. I also want others to realize how damaging the system along with other factors can be.


In the summer of 2009, it was discovered that my then 16 year old son had been taken advantage of by another child years previously. Then all the flood gates where open as he started opening up about the abuse that he had done to my niece and then soon after we discovered it was my daughter as well..


Needless to say this has been one of the worst experiences I have as a mother gone through. In sharing just minimal details I do hope others can help our family as well as someone else family. We have battled child protection services and their double standards, not to mention time in legal battles and also serious family battles.
I no longer have any chance of reuniting my family back together and both my children have some extensive behavior issues. We have been through a number of therapies and are again attempting a new therapist for my daughter because of her boundary issues with men in general.  As another result child services put me on a list so I can never work with elderly young people or in the health care field for that matter. The pathetic part of that is it took them over a year to do that so they could blame someone for their mistakes. I was indeed at work while both of my kids where at home together when the incident occurred. As I stated before my son was 15 at the time so he was well old enough to watch his littler sister.


In my opinion situations such as ours become the reason these behaviors go unreported in our so just world. Life as my family goes has changed in so many ways. I had to make choices between two of my own kids on how to help them both. Ultimately my daughter the victim did suffer the worst has therapy was denied to her by her father for almost a year after the event. Now my son is in a long term treatment center doing wonderfully and we are still attempting to find a therapist that works well for my daughters needs. We have been through a few and are still searching but never giving up. The strength I have found to handle this all is of one and only above. Lots of praying and perseverance. Comments support is all welcome as well as any questions that are appropriate in nature. Thank you for allowing me to share just parts of my story I do hope it helps just one mother, one father or one family.