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worrying

There are several things crossing my mind as per usual! For some reason I am a constant worrier. So in order to organise my mind i'll make a list of all the things that worry me at this precise moment. I don't want to bore anyone, particularly as my writing skills arent too elaborate, but I think it'll make me feel better to acknowledge what is making me feel upset, tired...and at the end of the day, what's consuming me.

- I worry about not being good enough at work
- I worry about not having a job that is deemed intelligent
- I worry about being stuck in the same job for fearing about failure
- i feel paralysed, hence i no longer plan as I used to (live in different countries, being a high achiever)
- I worry for not being good in bed
- i worry that other will think im weird, self centred, uninteresting
- i worry my parents will struggle financially forever
- i worry my parents, my sisters or myself will get sick
- i worry that i;ll die
- I worry that my new (9months boyfriend) doesnt lilke me enough
- i worry that he'll break up with me
- i worry that i may not know the difference between actually really liking someone, or solely needing them to reassure me
- i worry that i dont have enough friends (and the ones that i do have live far away)
- i worry and analyse about everything id do

-I worry that im spoiling this relationship with attitudes that i never had before (silly insecurities, possessiveness (this is new to me)).etc

and these are some of the things that constantly haunt my mind. I have to say, im quite tired today (a cold and one long week).

I want to stop worrying and start living. I want to learn that its okay to be on my own and that i should not rely on someone else to make me feel happy. I want this mass anxiety to go away, im sure tomorrow will be a better day!



xxx

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