I’ve been having mommy guilt lately. My online success comes with sacrifices and putting my family on hold has been my greatest sacrifice thus far. You see, it’s always been my dream to be “somebody.” When you grow up with all sorts of abuse, you feel that you’re never going to be anybody, that you’re worthless. Because of this and being a high school dropout, I’ve strived for greatness at any cost. Today, I’m successful but have turned on the TV as a distraction for my toddler so that I can continue to be a success online. How selfish of me. My child, the one who depends on me for love, education, and conversation. If I’m not doing my mommy duties, do I deserve to be called a mom?
The internet has consumed me and it’s due time I made some changes. I have logged out of Twitter, logged out of several social networks, closed my email, and will only be blog when I want to, not because I have to. I need to find myself again, be with the family, and sort through my goals of where I want to go and who I want to be, on and offline. I know what my priorities are, but I need to reorganize how I go about achieving each of those goals.
I bought some books, games, and other fun projects to do with my son. I bought brand new dominoes to play with my older boys and my husband as a family. I insisted that we all go out and visit family or friends the other day; it was so much fun. I forgot how much fun it was to be with the family and away from the computer.
My goals are set, my priorities straightened. I know realize the importance of family before blogging; do you?