Mom and Dad’s Bed
by Bernadette Hale
When my boys were little, sleeping in our bed was something that they seemed to LOVE. There were many nights where due to colds or illnesses or bad dreams or when they were babies that they spent the night with us in our bed. It is so cozy and snuggly and warm and inviting to be all together in the bed. I had to fight the urge and the tendency when they were toddlers to automatically bring them into bed with me when they awoke in the night. It isn’t that I didn’t want them there—I did. And it was so easy to just get them and bring them in, as I knew they would settle down much faster, go to sleep, and stay asleep that way. But after some very difficult times with my first born from doing that WAY more than I should I wanted to be sure that my sons knew how to comfort themselves and put themselves back to sleep when they awoke in the night.
Early mornings were another time when we would all snuggle together in the bed. If one got up a little earlier than desired, I would simply pull him into bed with me. We would snuggle and fall back to sleep till a more reasonable hour. If another one awakened he would see the two of us and automatically want to join us! Before the day began I usually ended up with all four in bed with me! There is something about being sleepy together that creates an atmosphere of intimacy and love. Those were special times that I thought were long gone till Saturday morning the other day.
Now, don’t get all wigged out! At eighteen, sixteen, thirteen, and twelve they weren’t all down under the covers with hubby and me sleeping. But it was interesting as each one slowly awoke to watch how they all came to find a corner of the bed to share and watch the TV with good ol’ mom and dad. When the fourth one finally came sauntering in to join us, I looked around at all of them. We have a queen size bed, but it is no small task finding comfortable space for six grown sized people on our bed. No one said anything like move over and make room. It seemed just automatic that everyone naturally pulled up their legs or moved over and turned to maximize the space so we could all fit. It was a moment. I knew it. I knew that in the future there isn’t likely going to be many days left where my sons come and in their own “manly” way snuggle with mom and dad in the bed. I stole a glance at hubby.
Sure enough he knew it too. He was looking right at me and when I caught his eye he glanced around at all of them and looked back at me and smiled. Of course, we said nothing to our grown up guys all snuggled in mom and dad’s bed. The moment would have been ruined if we had. We simply took each others hands and I laid my head on his shoulder and we drank in the look of them, the feel of them all around us. It was nice. It was a blessing. It is the stuff of life! I said a quick prayer of thanks to the Lord and gave a heavy sigh. My family. Wow. Such an awesome gift that I so very often take for granted!
I chuckled a little to myself as I thought about the number of years that we have had this bed. I bought it after the birth of my first son. It is a good eighteen years old, but still in good shape. And throughout the years there has always been a pull for my children to come into our room and spend time on our bed. I have heard them all say at one time or another that our bed is softer and cozier and more comfortable. Well, maybe it is. I think though that it is the emotional component of it being mom and dad’s bed that makes it that way more than anything else. I doubt any of my sons would admit that, but I am convinced it is true. Somewhere in the back of their minds they remember many nights where they found peace and comfort for their pain or their fears right there in that bed with us. In this room is our bed, yes, but it is also a representation of the care and love and safety of their parents. Even now as almost totally grown up men, they subconsciously seek out that safety and comfort. I am glad that they did.
I hope it isn’t the last time they do. I hope there are just a few more mornings where we all end up in our bed, sleepy, groggy, tired, but cozy, safe, and warm together. The time has gone so fast. From twenty inches long to sixty-three, sixty-eight, sixty-nine, and seventy-two inches long! Wow! They sure have grown. Funny. No matter how old they get I think that there will always be something about mom and dad’s bed. Then they will have their own families and will gather their precious children onto their own beds and the draw of mom and dad’s bed will continue on.