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Out of the Mouths of Babies

Kids say the darndest things … they really, really do. As moms, we can be in awe one minute and in stitches the next. Sometimes their quotes are deep—more profound than they can really understand at their age—and other times, we see the depth of their thought and the process of their learning.

“I’m Irish, my husband is American, and we’ve always told our four-year-old daughter that she is half Irish. All the talk of St. Patrick’s Day lately gets her thinking ... and she asked me the other night, ‘Mom, I was just wondering ... which half of me is Irish?’”—from Nicola

“My seven year old son asked, ‘Mom, are you sure all boys have penises?’”—from Carly

“One morning, when I was driving Alecia to school (she was four at the time), a very rude driver cut me off. Being the reactionary that I am said, ‘You son of a bitch!’ Later that evening, our dog jumped up on Alecia, who was wearing her new tights. Like mother like daughter—she knew what to say. ‘You son of a bitch … you ripped my stockings.’ She didn’t get punished … and I tried hard not to laugh!”—from Cheryl

“My father was taking my then-eight-year-old daughter Dani out for a ride on their bicycles and she did something that Grandpa had to reprimand her for. She got off the bike, put her hands on her hips, and said, ‘You’re not my father!’ My dad responded, ‘I am better than your father; I am your grandfather. I have seniority.’ She laughs about it to this day.”—from Mary

“My daughter was three when I had a second child. She was very excited when I came back from the hospital with her new sister, but after the initial curiosity wore off, she looked at me and asked, ‘Does she have to live here now?’”—from Joann

“We were in the airport and there were pictures of government officials. My son Roman, who just turned three, associates anything with a government seal or red, white, and blue with Barack Obama. And there was a photo of a man, a senator possibly, but he had hair on the sides and not on the top and he says, ‘That’s not Rocka-bama! That’s Dr. Phil!’”—from Holly Robinson Peete

We encourage you to share quotes from your kids.

By Michele Zipp

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