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Pro Choice vs. Pro Life – Can’t We All Get Along?

With the recent murder of abortion doctor, Dr. George Tiller (in church no less), it just stirs up the entire controversy of the abortion debate. First, let me say, I am Pro-Life. I will always be Pro-Life and I will never think that abortion is an acceptable means of birth control. But, it is not that black and white. What do you do about the thirteen-year-old young child who was raped, or was just plain too ignorant to know she was too young to have sex? What about the crack-addicted prostitute who needs a baby like another hit on crack? What about the young, white wing Christian woman who wants the baby more than anyone else, but will probably die as a result of being pregnant? Don’t these women deserve to have a choice to have a safe, legal abortion?

I get so frustrated with the “Pro Life Movement.” There they are each and every week at a Planned Parenthood picketing and yelling at women going into the clinic that they are going to hell, they are murdering their child. Is that not something between that woman and God? Is it their job to Judge? Are they offering these women practical alternatives other than a flier to the local “Birthright” facility? Is this showing them the love that Christ commanded us to show to the world?

We live in the 21st Century—it’s time to be realistic. Abortion is here, and it is here to stay. Whether we like it or not. Whether it is right or wrong. It is not up to me to judge someone’s choice. I truly believe whether you are Pro Life or Pro Choice, nobody wants to see women using it as a regular means for birth control. So, what is the solution? Is there middle ground? And, if there is, what do we do about it?

First of all, the Pro Life Movement needs to acknowledge and even accept that abortion is legal and it should remain legal. They do not have to agree that it should be used as a form of birth control. They do not have to give up their belief that all human life is created at the moment of conception. Secondly, The Pro Choice Movement needs to acknowledge and accept that all human life is precious. If both sides can come to that agreement, then perhaps, they can give up their agendas and work for a greater good.

What is the greater good? Allowing all women to make a well-informed decision regarding her health care. It begins with education. Should we be teaching abstinence based education in school? Yes. Should we be offering birth control options/education in school? Of course. It is not up to the school to teach our children morality or to wait until marriage. That is the job of parents. So, it’s time to be realistic. Nurse Kelly, the nurse at the high school where I went (many moons ago), taught what she called an abstinence-based education with realistic expectations. She did a great illustration. She dipped her finger in a jar of honey, and touched the fingers of a couple other kids in class and had them touch one other person, and that person touch another one. Pretty soon, each person in class had even the slightest bit of honey on their finger. She linked it to having sex, and when you have sex with one person—you have had sex with each person they have had sex with and so on and so on. It has stuck with me for all these years, and she still uses the illustration last time I checked. But, she also followed it up with giving each kid a rubber glove and doing it again to show them the benefits of using condoms, using birth control, etc. She was not giving them permission to have sex; she was educating them. She even had a rubber glove that had a hole in it and the honey went through the hole to show that not even condoms aren’t always effective.

Parents, teachers, preachers, society need to realize that you can tell your teens “no no no” but “yes yes yes” may be happening in the back seat of the car. So, would you rather your child be educated and prepared to either put a stop to things or if not stop, then go forward with the right tools? Ask Sarah Palin what she wishes her daughter would have done and I bet she will say she wishes her daughter said “no” or would have used birth control.

Realizing that the above lofty goal won’t solve the problems, the two sides need to get together regarding the issue of abortion. Again, education is the key to allowing a woman to make the right decision for her. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you went into a Planned Parenthood to discuss abortion, and you were offered a chance to speak with a counselor, offered a pamphlet on adoption or other options to the abortion? Planned Parenthood would acknowledge that the life being carried is precious. It’s not just some bothersome glob in your uterus. The scene in the movie Juno was great. The girl outside tells Juno, “It has fingernails, you know?” That helped her make the decision not to get rid of this baby, but to go ahead and help someone who couldn’t have a child be able to have one. This is where the ProChoicers need to compromise. They can acknowledge that what is in the womb is life, and it is precious. They can give options to abortion, and realize that abortion is not always the right decision for each woman. They can be what they call themselves “Pro Choice.”

For the poor teenager in the projects who can’t afford to raise a child who would be on welfare and be a burden to taxpayers, what is her choice? More often than not, an abortion. She doesn’t have the means, the education, or the know-how to do anything else. And, if she chooses to have a child, more often than not statistics state that she and the child become a burden on taxpayers. I do not know about you, but I would much rather have a productive member of society then someone living off my hard-earned tax dollars.

Instead of picketing Planned Parenthood, making women feel guilty, condemning people to hell, why not spend time, money, and energy on practical solutions to assist women in choosing an alternative route?

Why not work with this young girl to find a family to adopt her child or find a way to pay for her education so that she can leave the poverty she is in and be able to raise her child? What about spending the money the ProLife Movement spends to fight abortion clinics to open up free daycare/charter schools to young women who become pregnant so that they can have their child and get an education so that she and her unborn child can become productive members of society?

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if in every Planned Parenthood there were representatives of the ProLife Movement present, not to judge, but to provide practical alternatives and realistic solutions for women who have come seeking an abortion? Is it just pie in the sky to hope that the two sides can come together and work together to educate women and give each woman the best possible healthcare available to her? To actually give this woman a choice for her life.

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