Sleep Deprivation and Baby Love
It has been a while since I have blogged. Our daughter decided to make an early appearance (thank goodness!) and come eight days early before her due date. Now that makes all four of our children early arrivals. She is now twelve days old. What amazes me and I cannot seem to say it enough is how a little person can run an entire household. She has taken over the whole house! We all know who is in charge.
Since I am no longer working, I decided to try my hand at breastfeeding. It has been quite the experience. I bottled fed the others with formula. At the time, it was the decision I was most comfortable with and fit my single momma lifestyle. Now, I am a married, KEPT woman (thanks, baby) and I find that the nursing experience, while natural, is not easy! It took my baby and me days to figure the whole thing out. It was frustrating and for me, it was quite painful at first. I even had to go see a lactation consultant. I know that sounds so totally flaky, but she helped me out a lot. She introduced me to breast shields, which helped me out at the time. Now, I have tossed them to the side. We no longer need them and I have even graduated to feeding in public (which I was unsure if I would be able to do).
I have never been so challenged and proud of my accomplishment in my whole life, especially since I know how close I was to giving up on the whole thing. Of course, I am glad I did not. There are less dishes to wash, my body is healing much quicker, I am able to eat a little more (it is recommended for nursing mothers to eat 300 to 500 calories more a day), and it is so cheap. I mean, even if you take the breast pump rental, cover ups, and nursing bras into consideration—in other words, the initial overhead—you still come out saving a lot of money. You know me, thrifty as I can be to the end.
My appetite has increased since giving birth (I seem to be backwards from most women). I find myself splurging on ice cream. I try to justify this in my little biddy head that I am benefiting from eating more dairy, which is also recommended for nursing mothers. I mean, if you cannot fool yourself, who can you fool?
So nursing has not been all that I thought it would be; it definitely is better. It is also very time consuming. It takes at least thirty minutes every two hours or so. I am constantly trying to finish things up and eat in a hurry, just to beat the baby’s “hunger clock.” I think I fail more than I succeed in this department, but I am trying to be easy on myself.
Like I said, it IS amazing how a little one can take over the way she has. She is simply adorable, an extraordinary gift. I cannot help but stare at her. I have always been this way with my babies. I am always in awe that they are mine and I get to bring them home. It is wonderful to be able to create a loving family. There is nothing else like it.
Right now, as I write this, my new baby is sleeping in her snuggly on my lap. She loves her snuggly. For some reason, she loves being in cramped, uncomfortable positions. I am sure it reminds her of the place she comes from (my womb).
As I have said, we have three other kids. The youngest of them is still trying to adjust to the new baby. At first, he was happy to relinquish the “baby” title. Now, I think he has reservations about it. I know I see the green-eyed monster show up from time to time and see that he does not quite understand what all the fuss is about. It is hard to explain to a young one that attention is not being taken away, just refocused for a while. Babies cannot do one thing for themselves, but cry to let you know they need something. And cry she does.
One year ago today, I was still a working mom. In just a short time, I have totally changed my lifestyle. It has been an experience filled with uncertainty, doubts, and definitely fear. Now, almost a year later, I am more confident in my new role and appreciate it. My kids love me being around more and I have been able to help them out so much. I feel like we have gotten to know each other much better, and I am calmer. At least, I think I am.
Okay, the laundry is calling me. I know, glamorous, huh? I will write more later. I am sure there will be tons for me to sound off on or to ramble on about. I can hardly wait!