1. Lying can be a part of ADHD and often occurs in children with this diagnosis.
2. Lying often occurs when the child doesn’t want to get into trouble. A lot of times, it’s easier to tell a fib than to “fess up” about what they did. Due to their lack of problem-solving skills, they see no other way out, so they choose to lie.
3. You can minimize the need to lie, by eliminating or lessening some punishments that might cause the child to lie to avoid.
I’ve really taken a look at how I can revise the way I act to disobedience. Am I being to harsh? Are the consequences to severe? Am I involving my husband? Have I prayed about it?
When an infringement has happened, if they tell me about it, or if they are honest when asked, I need think before reacting, confer with my husband, and then we need to state the consequences in a calm, matter-of-fact way, eliminating their need to lie in order to stay out of trouble.
4. If you know that your child has already lied, don’t set them up to lie again. Don’t ask them questions you already know the answer to, to see if they will be honest. Don’t set them up to fail twice.
This is something I think we tend to do with our children. “Let’s see if they will be honest this time.” only to be disappointed. Parents can make their kids into liars by always catching them in the lie.
5. Write a contract between you and your child. Define what lying is and what the consequence will be if they lie. Let the child come up with a reasonable consequence for himself. If you can catch your child before there is a chance to lie, remind him of the contract that you agreed upon. This should help to jog their memory and to reduce the need to lie.
6. Lying will tend to get better as the child grows into maturity. With the proper discipline and guidance, this problem can be solved.
Read to them the book by Aesop’s Fable The Boy Who Cried Wolf.
Scriptures about lying:
Proverbs 12:19 “Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.”
Proverbs 12:22 “The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.”
Proverbs 21:6 “A fortune made by a lying tongue is a fleeting vapor and a deadly snare.”
Leviticus 19:11 “Do not steal. Do not lie. Do not deceive one another.”
Psalm 34:13- “Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.”