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The Worst Mother Ever

I love my twelve-year-old son; however, I hate being his mother. Oh, I would never tell him so, and I try very hard not to show him how I feel. He has ADHD, he’s defiant, and he is impulsive. He also lies and steals constantly. 

I dread the beginning of every school year and want to vomit every morning when I drop him off at school. Will he fight today? What will he steal? Is this that day that the police come to my door? Will the parents of the child that he fought sue me? I am anti-abortion, but you will never see me pick up a picket sign. Sometimes, I think … hmm. 

I know he’s a menace, but because I am his mother, I am expected to defend him. I beg with him and plead with him to just tell a teacher if someone is bothering him. I explain that stealing is wrong. I’ve taken him to pediatricians, psychiatrists, counselors, therapists, mentors, and preachers. I’ve tried spankings, threatening, persuasion, and bribes. Nothing works. I will get that phone call. I will have to go sit in a conference room full of teachers who tell me how horrible my son is. On a good day, I may only be called to the school to talk about his low grades. I have to work; I can’t go to the school every day and sit with him or discuss him. I can’t!

Where is his father? He blames me for this. He tells me that I’ve spoiled him and do not discipline him. I used to spank him, then he’d fight. I used to give him money, then he’d steal. I’d buy him a video game, then he’d steal. The boy will steal with money on him. Who does that?

I want to be that mother who enjoys her son. I want to be happy to see my child. Tell me how. Right now, Omaha, Nebraska (child abandonment is legal there up to age seventeen) is looking mighty good to me.

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